A
male
age
,
*aveL
writes:Last Christmas when I was out eating with friends they dared me to ask out a young Polish waitress. Now I'm 58(and Single) and I was amazed when she said yes.I later found out she is 19. We had a tremendous time and I've been seeing her ever since. We have fantastic sex.She is a strong person and bosses me a bit and certainly likes her own way but it works. She now wants to move in with me. Am I acting like a silly old fool or should I call it a day now. I want to be with her all the time but should I let her be with people of her own age?
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female
reader, DIE-romantic. +, writes (29 June 2007):
 Shes old enough to make her choices. She seems to be in love with you as well. So go for it and have fun! Your not a silly old fool at all. But all i can warn you about, like everyone else, is make sure she isnt using you. :) Take care. xxxx
A
male
reader, DaveL +, writes (19 June 2007):
DaveL is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks all you wonderful people for all your comments. I've never been happier. We have just talked through all your suggestions and I am convinced we each love each other deeply and despite my worries we both know what we are doing. My beautiful Polish angel has now told her folks in Poland and they will back her. I hope to meet them soon. When this happens to you at 58 when you wonder if the right person exists it give s you a great feeling. But with your help I have stood back from my personal position and been able to see the "big picture". thanks all 8 replies I've seen. May your own lives be as exciting as mine.
Dave
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A
female
reader, Amyjean +, writes (18 June 2007):
I think its wonderful that you have the enthusiasm to be with your Polish girl, she too must love you to be still with you and commit to you by wanting to share your home.if there were major problems they would have shown by now.The note by Irish 49 contains some great stuff read it carefully. i would say well done, love her for what you know she is and have a great life.
Love
Amy
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2007): You are both legal adults, then no one can tell you that you are being silly or rhat this gae gaprelationship is wrong. . You ask if you should let her to be with people her own age? Of course! You can still do this, and still date her. But I have to ask...does she have a lot of friends and does she relate/socialize with a lot of people her own age? I only ask because quite often young women who get involved with older men, quite often don't relate well to people their own age. Or some young women could be, as Eyes, pointed out...your money. You got to watch out for the goldiggers. If she shows a perpensity for spending your money and not having a job/career of her own (laziness), no real purpose, no goals...then you may have a shallow, troubled young woman on your hands. She might be expecting you to 'give' her a life and that's wrong.
Assuming, she is not doing that and your relationship is a very happy,mutually respectful, caring relationship, your gf should be absolutely positive that she has the committment it will take to overcome, some possible obstacles. Some of these obstacles may or may not apply to your both. Or maybe you both have discussed this. If not, it's wise to talk about these below pointers.
1) Health. It should be realized, that when a 19 year old and a 58 year old, get involved... the age gap, physically, grows wider with each passing year. So..no matter how healthy you are now, you may get into some serious health/energy issues that the younger partner could find troublesome to deal with, in her own stage in life. I am not saying you are old and frail..heck, I'm 51 and I feel 31, but progressing age can bring different aging problems with it. When you grow old together, being close to the same age at each stage, can be somewhat easier to manage, emotionally. Is she up for it? Make sure she is completely aware of the aging/health problems that could be a big part of her future. Does she have the committment and maturity to hang in there, through sickness and health?
2) Children. Your young partner may wants kids someday. Are you prepared to be a father at this stage in your life. Your life expectancy may not match a child's growing-up years. A lot of older guys do question their level of patience to raise a child and cannot see themselves as being able to cross the generation gap with their partner, when it comes to proper parenting.
3) Energy. You may find that you could no longer have the desire to participate in doing activities that she craves to do. (dancing, concerts, physical sports/activities) You and she may do things together now that could change for you, in 15 years time. Whereas, she at 29, will still be young enough to want to do those things, still.
Depending on her maturity level, her personality, and her life goals...you both could match well together. But it is a good thing to really sit and talk about the possible future issuesand obstacles that could crop up. . Mainly health and children issues. Best to discuss all this before she moves in with you. Because if she planning on doing that, then it's plain to see this has gotten quite serious. Good luck and I wish you both happiness.
.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (18 June 2007):
 As long as she isn't using you then go have fun but watch the purse strings.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 June 2007): As long as you are prepared to deal with being ridiculed by other people, and you don't feel like a silly old fool when you're with her, and you know her intentions are pure...than it's o.k. But you have to think about her moving in with you seriously. That's a big step. If you're feeling like a fool about this, maybe it's not meant to be.Also, you better make sure you're being careful when having sex, unless you're prepared to be a dad, b/c at 19, she's in her prime fertilization.
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A
female
reader, love-him +, writes (18 June 2007):
 Hia no matter how much i hate the fact im gona say this.. my grandad who is 60, is going out with someone who is 20.. so i cant exactly say anything.. i mean its alrite if u wanna have fun n all that.. but watch out she doesnt try u for ur money.. my nana recently died and my grandad got mostly everything which he then HALVED with his 20 year old girlfriend who he had been with ehr just a month! so i hope i helped, but watch out x x x mail me if u wna talk x x x
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A
female
reader, bubbloo24  +, writes (18 June 2007):
 Nahhh I don't think you're being an silly fool! You're living your life and having fun. If you're both happy then why should age difference stand in the way!
Take care and have fun! xx
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A
female
reader, alicespring  +, writes (18 June 2007):
 hey Im Polish as well, Im 23 and Im working in a banking althouht 58 its a bit too much for me I can say that I was with 40 years old guy and it was great at that time I was 22!!!!I was founding him much more smart and interessting that all guys in my age. Maybe I grow up too quickly?? Im quite pretty girl so I could fin easly good looking guy in age of 23 till lets say 30 but most of them arent very mature!!!but be aware of the fact that maybe she ll treat you more like someone who will take care about her as she is in foregin country she must feel lonely. there is a risk that u will be more like a father for her than a lover or partner since she is just 19.at least she is searching kind of protection if she wants to be with guy in her dads age I guess. Althought Im nt very good in helping people good lack !!!!
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A
female
reader, burningbridges  +, writes (18 June 2007):
You don't need to 'Let' her be with people her own age; she's equip to make her own choices. Assuming she loves you, have fun with the pretty Polish waitress and enjoy your May/December romance.
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