A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hey im 18 and just found out a week ago im 3 months pregnant i told my boyfriend but he's just completely avoiding me he doesn't answer my calls and wont text back i know this mite sound stupid but i dont wanna tell my parents as ive not reli actually been goin out with him but neither of us has seen any1 else, please help! i dnt know wot 2 do and if i go 4 an abortion i dont think i could go thru with it plz help!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2008): Your boyfriend sounds like a doo doo head... But I will give him the benifit of the doubt, and guess he is just scared. As for telling your parents, you have to. You made the adult decesion to have sex, so you need to do the mature choice, and tell your parents. Don't even think about a abortion...You will regret it for the rest of your life. All baby's are a true gift from God.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (29 July 2008):
Well your boyfriend is obviously just terrified and is hoping the problem will go away. It won't. Text him one more time and tell him that you are going to assume he wants nothing to do with the baby and will make decision on what do do about it on your own. Hopefully he will realise that if he doesn't have his say now, he never will and will get in touch. In a way, if he has abandoned you, it will make your decision easier as it will be up to you and you don't have to worry about him.
You are going to have to tell someone close to you, either a friend, or a sister, or your parents, you can't go through this alone.
Adoption is an option for you if you don't want to have an abortion. Talk to Brook, they are a charity who can talk to you about all your options confidentially.
http://www.brook.org.uk/content/M1_contactus.asp
They have so much experience with cases like this that they will be able to go through everything with you and help you figure out what is best for you and the baby.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
male
reader, ChiRaven  +, writes (29 July 2008):
 The guy has freaked, I'll give you long odds. Now whether he stays that way or whether he shapes up and comes around eventually is a very good question. There's no way to tell, but the more likely outcome is that you're on your own.
That being the case, the support of your parents is going to be crucial to you. The idea of you alone against the world just isn't going to work. You've really got to tell them right away, because they are not as stupid as you might think they are and they are going to be figuring it out real soon now if they haven't already. It's way better if you volunteer the information than if they have to confront you with it themselves. Yes, it's a hard thing to do, and their reaction is likely not going to be a good one, but it's something you're going to have to get through sooner or later. You can't keep it a secret forever. So do it now.
Once the initial shock is out of the way, sit down with them and discuss your options. I'm sure you know what they are. Then take things from there. But get it out in the open now. You can't avoid it for much longer.
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A
female
reader, Angela.B +, writes (29 July 2008):
 If you are 3 months pregnant, then in 6 months time you are going have a baby.
That might seem an obvious thing to say, but when that day comes around don't you think your parents are going to notice? Of course realistically they are going to notice your body changing and your "bump" long before that.
Telling your parents might not be easy, but your going to have to do it sooner or later and it won't be any easier later so you may as well bite the bullet and tell them now. Don't leave it any longer.
Right now you need some support from people close to you, and in a few months time you will need that support even more. Your parents should be a good source for that support.
As for your boyfriend, well, he needs to face up to his responsibilities. But if he's the same age as you he will probably be feeling pretty scared himself. Give him a few days to get used to the idea and then see what the situation is.
However, as you weren't even really going out properly it's unlikely he is going to suddenly turn into a loving devoted partner. He should still at least be there to support his child and you as the mother of his child.
But please, go talk to your parents and stop putting it off. That is the most important first step that you need to take at the moment.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2008): I'm so sorry to hear about you horrible situation. You must be very scared and feel very alone.
Your boyfriend is probably shocked and panicing. Is there anywhere you could go to meet up with him in person?
If you don't think you could go through with an abortion then I think you shouldn't avoid even thinking about going down that road, as if you do in the end have an abortion, because of your doubts, it could seriously damage your mental well being.
I really think you should tell your parents. They will know what to do. I know it would be really hard. I don't know how your parents will react when they find out, but if it's any comfort a friend of mine got herself into a similar situation nearly two year ago now. She suddenly found out she was two months pregnant to a man she was not going out with. He was also 10 years her seniour (She was 19). She waited for one week and then told her parents... She just suddenly blurted it out. She became really ill a little while after that and had to go to hospital. Her parents understood and supported her through out her pregancy. She now has a beautiful little girl.
I know this must be seriously hard for you, but if you do think you are going to keep the baby then the soor you tell your parents the better.
Good luck. Please let us know who you get on and what you decided to do.
I hope the father gets his head together for you.
Emivia. x
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