A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been dating my guy for over a year and a half. We've both been married before. Currently no kids. We're both established. And own our own homes. For the entire length of our relationship I've lived about 100 miles away from him and I basically made the trip to spend every weekend at his place. I'm in the process of moving closer to him (probably about 30 miles away now). And he's been instrumental on my house hunt. I want to marry this man. He is phenominal. But I'm not sure he'll ever ask (it took him 5 years to ask his live-in ex and then she burned him). I want to have kids someday and still be young enough to enjoy them. And I'm already 32 and he's 40. How much longer do I wait? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2008): You shouldn't have to wait any longer if you just ask him what his intentions are for your future with him. Just be honest with him, and tell him that you would love for him to be your husband, and the father of your children. That way you don't have to live in LIMBO. Please know that I will be praying for you Love Bug. Please let me know how thing go!!
A
female
reader, Umari Solanthus  +, writes (29 July 2008):
 If his ex burned him, then the chances are he will be wary about taking that step again. Such a betrayal can do that to you. He may not want to make that step again, or if he does he'll want to wait a good deal more to make sure you have a solid relationship.
Have you ever talked about marriage during the course of your relationship? If not, you could gently slip it into a conversation and try to find out where he stands. Or get a friend to ask 'have you ever considered getting married again?'
It may be that he doesn't want to get married again. Would it affect your relationship if you didn't? You could still be together and live together and have children, plenty of people do these days. Marriage is a slip of paper--okay, and a nice dress and being the centre of attention and proclaiming your love before God, but it isn't everything. Nice if you can get it, but shouldn't be so important that you cannot be with them if they won't.
If he does want to get married again, but doesn't look like he's going to ask any time soon, perhaps you could take the initiative and pop the question yourself?
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