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I'm 18 and have no friends and no real family to confide in, where do I go from here?

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Question - (10 May 2013) 5 Answers - (Newest, 14 May 2013)
A female United States age 30-35, *23amazed writes:

Hey my lovely aunts and uncles. I'm really depressed lately and I thought I would come on here to ask for your help and opinions. This post will be a bit long so please hang in there because I'm really desperate for help.

I'm only 18 years old and a part time college student. My problem is I don't have any friends.

I also don't have much family either.

I literally only have my father and he is who I live with at the moment.

I love my father and he's a great guy. But basically...I have no one to be with on holidays and things like that.

I just never talk to my family and don't have a close relationship with them as I would like to. I've tried a couple of times to make plans with some of my family and nothing ever really follows through or works out right.

Now when it comes to friends and friendship, I have the worst luck ever with them.

I was friends with people once who all turned on me and began bullying me all of the time.

I was then later friends with other people who would always leave me out of stuff and seemed to never want to hang out or talk to me anymore out of nowhere. There was even two girls last year who tried so desperately to ruin my life and make me miserable.

They always use to say how funny it was that they were ruining my life.

I'm just really upset of being treated this way by a lot of people I considered good friends. I was tired of being dumped by everybody and people turning on me and leaving me out and being mean to me and everything. I was just tired of never feeling like I was good enough for anyone.

So now I am 18 and I don't have anyone I can consider my friend and I don't have any family I can talk to or confide in. I don't know where I should go from here. I just feel isolated and I feel like a loser. A lot of people my age have tons of friends and family.

Should I even bother with trying to make new friends? How can I get through this and what should I do from here?

View related questions: depressed, on holiday

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A male reader, Mwaih Kenya +, writes (14 May 2013):

Mwaih agony aunthey there, i dont see the reason to why you should worry over nothing, friends are good but they mean nothing at times. i am a university student, i dont have friends and even a girl friend for that matter. am not also much into family. it was hard at first but i got used to it. i just learned to accept my own company and yes well enough am doing fine. i believe everything happens for a reason. sometimes no matter how much we try to make things alright they still go unexpected, so there is a reason to why you dint make up with those friends and even family. i just wish you the best in life but dont hate your family or anybody, though that my opinion. mwaih.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2013):

Why do you think the friends you've had in your life have turned on you?

Observe people that seem to get a long with people and have friends, how do they do it?

I get the sense maybe you're trying too hard to make friends and not letting it happen naturally. I always had a hard time making friends. For me it was shyness. Over the years I have started to grow out of it. Some of it out of exhaustion or frustration. Once I let go it sort of came about on its own, sometimes without me realizing it.

Involve yourself in more public recreational activities whether that be online or in your neighbourhood, things that interest you and see what happens.

Best of luck

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A female reader, largentsgirl89 United States +, writes (11 May 2013):

largentsgirl89 agony auntI am 24 years old and I have my boyfriend who has been my only true friend for the past five years. All of my other friends went off, decided they were too good to hang out with me, blah blah blah.

I have a rather large family, my mom is deceased but I have six brothers and sisters and we're pretty close. But I'm very picky about my friends because there aren't that many good people anymore.Very hard to find trustworthy people.

All I can tell you is to be friendly and nice. No matter what. Don't tolerate mistreatment, but just be nice. You don't owe anyone anything. Just live your life.

I'll be your friend. :)

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A female reader, largentsgirl89 United States +, writes (11 May 2013):

largentsgirl89 agony auntI am 24 years old and I have my boyfriend who has been my only true friend for the past five years. All of my other friends went off, decided they were too good to hang out with me, blah blah blah.

I have a rather large family, my mom is deceased but I have six brothers and sisters and we're pretty close. But I'm very picky about my friends because there aren't that many good people anymore.Very hard to find trustworthy people.

All I can tell you is to be friendly and nice. No matter what. Don't tolerate mistreatment, but just be nice. You don't owe anyone anything. Just live your life.

I'll be your friend. :)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2013):

Hey girl just smile.Release your emotions your negativities.See am an Indian(google our family culture)and believe me I was in your place few months back.Just stay happy with yourself coz you owe nothing to anyone.Its your life.Just close your eyes shut yourself cry and fret as long as you want but thats it.Gain self worth,hit back when offended things will get back to normal.And no need to compare with other people's community have a life of ur own

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