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I'm 16, and my 20 year old boyfriend has 3 kids, am I in over my head?

Tagged as: Dating, Family<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 December 2009) 3 Answers - (Newest, 1 January 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *an_Dan writes:

I am sixteen and seventeen in under a month. I am with a guy who i've been with now over a month he is 20. And even though it's only been a month i am really falling for him, he is amazing when i'm with him he makes me feel happy. The only problem is he has three kids. 1 with one partner, and than two with another. one isn't his though, he chose to take her on when he was with the mother of the child. One is 1, another 2 and the eldest 3. I haven't met the kids yet, i think he wants me to.. but im not sure..i know that its got to be hard for him as his ex cheated, and i understand that children cant keep seeing people walking out there dads lives...but He is not with the mothers no more, and he doesn't get on with the children's mothers. Am i in over my head? or do you think this situation could actually work out? i go to college, and i do eventually want to go in the army. I'm having a really difficult life at the moment, and when i was in hospital he came to visit me. He tells me that were serious but not to serious, what does he mean by this? i have so many thoughts in my head, and to be honest i don't know what to do, because i really do like him he is amazing, i see him a couple of times a week, sometimes i want more attention, he's always saying sorry, and that he understands i am taking a lot on. Most of the times we make plans, and than they get re-aranged, just like tonight. ( new years eve) we were planning a night out and last night he told me he had to have the kids Please write back x

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A male reader, Red Green 0289 United States +, writes (1 January 2010):

yes, and he's a looser... this guy has a pattern, and your in his sights... RUN!

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A female reader, Ich_liebe_dich Philippines +, writes (1 January 2010):

Ich_liebe_dich agony auntsweety, its not that im giving you a negative thought about this situation. But sweety You are young and fresh. Theres a lot more beautiful things are waiting for you,

Im not saying that you are going to waste your time and life to this man, but look at it. do you wanna be the next mother of his 4rth child and after that he will look for another woman. c'mon sweety dont let this man manipulate your emotion. go find another man who is more less responsabilities than this.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (31 December 2009):

He has children with two other women and he's only 20? I'd say rethink this, because he doesn't seem like a reliable guy. How long until you have a kid with him and he wanders off or something. the other thing is you need to accept now he has kids and his plans will always change for them. That means when you make plans, they could change, as they have. And he's even said you're not too serious. I think you would be better finding a guy without so much commitment at this age.

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