A
female
age
30-35,
*outhernsweetie15
writes:Okay. So here's the deal.I met this guy.. lets call him Justin (not real name).. on Friday... well no I've been talking to him for SO much longer... I've been talking to him since i was 13 and he was 18 but now I'm 15 and he's 20. I actually met him online... I know crazy right? I've actually never done anything like that ever. (I saw him on cam and I talked to him on the phone so I knew that he was real and not like 80 with 8492 cats) I don't think I ever will again so dont worry but here's my problem.He's 20. I'm 15. I like him so much! He came through the town i just moved to and he told me about a week or two before that he would and he asked if we could meet up. So I said okay... I WAS FREAKING OUT! I mean with good reason of course because I was so nervous and had never done something remotely crazy like this. I'm a good girl. I'm a good religious, Christian girl. I figured it'd be okay because he was really religious too (and he's a virgin, too). So after he told me he was coming into town I told my mom that my friend Justin who was a counciler at camp in TN (I mean I went to church camp in TN and he was a counciler at one like four miles away so I guess that wasn't a total lie.. I know that's really immature but the "little white lie" was tearing me up inside and I'll tell her) was coming into town and I told her he's 20... and she said I should invite him over to swim.. So I did. He came into town and we met at my house and it was so great to finally meet him. We had a BLAST! and he even kissed me on the forehead when he was leaving... but finally my question is.. is it okay for us to like each other? i mean he seemed to like me too. but do you think just a relationship with no sex or anything like that would be okay? or should I wait? Help? thanks guys =]
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female
reader, lalilove94  +, writes (15 August 2009):
 I think you should give you two a chance, he seems like a really nice guy and you seem really sweet, just be sure of how far you want to get. I believe that the law is very black and white, they don't see there is a story behind everything, just do what you feel like doing, and be prepared for the best and the worse (: good luck sweetie
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female
reader, poseyk4 +, writes (27 April 2009):
i have the same problem i really like this guy im 15 and he is 20 i really like him and we want to go out but im afraid people will look at it in a wrong way
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female
reader, pvchick2011 +, writes (3 October 2008):
I'm in the same situation. I've been talking to a guy for a while now and he's 20 and I'm 15. I actually was looking around for advise also. I think that age is just a number and it doesn't matter. He says that it doesn't when you're like 17 or so. I love him truly and would do anything for him. I say go for it but that's just my opinion.
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reader, southernsweetie15 +, writes (21 July 2008):
southernsweetie15 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey thanks guys!
You've been a really big help =]
It's a little easier to think about it now and you're totally right... why would he even consider lying to my parents?
But I think he's a genuine and sweet guy so I don't think I have to really worry about "his intentions"... and maybe you're right and I should worry more about that. But you warned me, right? If it turns out you're right I'll let ya all say "I told you so."
To those who worry about the "sexual/physical relationship," I don't think you'll have to worry too much. I'm staying a virgin until I'm married to the guy I fall for.
As for "Justin," it's not like I love him. He's just a sweet 20 year old, fun guy to hang out with ya know?
But thanks for the help guys =]
Message me or comment again if you have more to say? =]
Thanks=]
-Kate
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female
reader, simplysweet393 +, writes (21 July 2008):
i think it's ok for you to carry on with the relationship... as long as there is trust. I'm in the same situation as you girl! lol I'm 15 and met my guy online too.. he's 20 and i know.. it is pretty crazy coz i am a good girl and religious too and yea i would be like the least likely person to do that but i did..lol so yea.. don't worry about it.. if you like him alot and you're sure he feels just the same about you, i think you should be with him. :)
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reader, MuffinGirl  +, writes (21 July 2008):
 Be with him. I was in same situation like you, i had boyfriend who was 20 and i was 15. We're still very good friends. Just listen to your heart and not that religious crap things. It's not very big age difference at all. 5 years is something but is not big deal. But be careful about sexual adventures with him. If you're not ready, just tell him. He would wait if he really cares about you. Just relax in moments of fresh love and don't think about ages too much. Don't worry. The sky is the limit.
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reader, scrazy  +, writes (21 July 2008):
 I think you should wait until you're older. Technically, there's nothing wrong with you two having a relationship right now, required there's NO sex involved, but I'm pretty sure even if you remained a virgin until you were legal, people still won't like the idea.
Especially the idea of their child dating a grown man.
I actually have to question his intentions as well because why would he just agree to lie to your family like that? So he could spend time with you? I'm sorry, it just gives me a bad feeling. But I don't personally know him, so he could have only the best for you in mind.
If he truly cares about you, he won't mind just remaining friends until you're legal and you can date without any legal repercussions. He'll be able to wait for you.
Take Care
XO
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reader, °Ale°  +, writes (21 July 2008):
 Well.. you took every little risk imaginable and things 'worked' out for you. Err.. not so much,dear. If the guy really cares for you, why would he agree to come into your house and lie to your family? I question wether this guy has good intentions. It just sounds all too weird that a 20 year old would have such a relationship and have your best interest as well. I could be wrong and he might be a respectful guy who will be willing to wait for you until you're of legal age and maybe then do the right thing and have healthy and open relationship.
Be smart, sweets and be patient. If he's meant to be yours- he will wait and not make you tell white little lies.
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reader, 13AF +, writes (21 July 2008):
Technically, a relationship between people of your age is legal as long as there is no sexual contact since you are under the age of consent. But a relationship with that age difference at your age (when you're older, five years won't seem as big) is very likely to be frowned upon. Maintaining a friendship would be fine, and you are legal in three years time, but talk it over with your parents and him before actually committing to a relationship with him. And you might want to check the laws in your state first just to be sure there isn't a law prohibiting a physical relationship of any sort (ie passionate kissing) between you two.
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