A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I am 12 weeks pregnant and my husband is cheating with one of he's co-worker and she is married too I dont know who's the jerk, but this problem is driving me crazy I just don't know what to do. I must leave him or stay cuz of the baby?...thanks
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2010): I'd get ready to get out. You have some time to plan your exit and need to get an attorney and collect all the financial records. Specifically get his 401K, and any other investments that he's made in marriage and get all the credit card info and bank accounts. I'd consider you moving out, unless you can handle any house payments on your own. If not, make him either sell the house, or buy you out (assuming that there's a house).
Talk to your attorney, and see how to handle the affair. Resist the urge to fill in the woman's husband or how and what you say to his employer.
Consider putting a restraining order on him to not contact you and to not move money or hide assets.
I'd then take him for ever dime he has, and get some serious child support. I hope that you're in a state where you can get alimony.
I have zero tolerance for spouses that cheat... ask my ex-wife, who got nothing but credit card debit when she moved out to be with her "true love"... best thing that ever happened to me!
A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (27 October 2010):
 Never stay because of the baby. What you need and what the child needs is real love. Whether you find that with someone else or you find that on your own, it does not matter, as long as neither of you are being continuously deceived, all will be alright. The child needs strong parents and you need someone who will love you without a doubt.
My mother raised me and my sisters all by herself, occasionally she meets someone who is alright but she does not need them. It is up to you whether or not you wish to find love in another man or in yourself but whatever you do, leave your current husband.
I hope that helps.
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A
male
reader, slimfish  +, writes (27 October 2010):
 dont stay because of the baby, you need to have a good talk with him and sort your life out.
do you have the finance to bring this baby into the world and give it the life it rightly deserves.?.
decide only on the basis of whats best for you and the baby.
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A
female
reader, No watered down advice here! +, writes (27 October 2010):
 I agree with what Tennisstar88 said."Don't stay together because of the baby..It will only make for a nastier divorce" And I'll add that I think right now the baby deserve the best of everything! And staying will not be in the best interest of the baby. In two ways for now. One you're "At risk for STD'S" & "Stress" can bring on an early delivery. Leave for the sake of the BABY!. Don't stay for the sake of the BABY. IJS!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2010): If you can't see a future or see yourself happy with this person, do not stay because of the baby. You will not do your child any favors growing up in a home with unhappy parents. Personally I think the guy sounds like scum if he's cheating on you, let alone when you are pregnant. It's your decision, but if you decide to stay and nothing changes it will likely affect your child in a negative way. Do what's in the your/your baby best interest. Good luck
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A
female
reader, Fernn  +, writes (27 October 2010):
Staying with him for the baby will make things work. you have to think of you and the baby. you shouldnt care about his feelings as he obviously doesnt care about yours when sleeping about. if you forgive him then he knows he has got away with it and probably do it again. yano the saying "once a cheat, always a cheat". in my opinion i would leave him but make it clear to him you want a friendship for the child's sake. do what your heart tells you but you would be a fool to stay with him in my eyes!
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (27 October 2010):
 Don't stay together because of the baby..It will only make for a nastier divorce in which your child will see down the road. He's pretty heartless to cheat on you when your pregnant with his child. In my opinion, all it takes is one time for my husband to cheat on me and I'd kick him to the curb. It's your call if you love him and you think you can get past this then confront him and tell him to go to marriage counseling with you to salvage this marriage. If that's strike one he's out then draw up divorce papers and have them ready when he comes home one day. Do keep in mind you don't need this stress and drama because it can affect your pregnancy. Decide what's best for you and your baby.
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