A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I love my gf and she tells me that she loves me more than anything in the world but whenever I mention us living together she is not intersted.when we are together we have a great time, i can feel the love from her and we feel like we are in our own world.but for some reason she wont move in with me as she says she is not ready but to me that is not a valid reason? is there anything that i can do or say to find out exactly what the reason is she wont move in with me? am i being unreasonable? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI own my own house outright as i dont pay rent or pay a mortgage, she lives with her family..
I just want some sort of commitment as I think we have been together for a long time...
my biggest issue is that it could go days or even two weeks and I dont see her and that bugs me as I want to see her all the time, whereas to her it is not a problem that she doesnt see me for two weeks and she thinks it is normal..
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (31 October 2008):
You don't give enough details about you or her for us to be able to give you answer.
It could be that she is happy with things the way they are now and doesn't want you to have to see her all grotty and giving her legs a wax.
Or maybe like me she loves having her own space and independance.
Or maybe she can't afford the rent you are paying.
Give some more details if you want more advice.
But you could just go and say that you don't mind if she doesn't want to live with you and just want to know what's she's thinking.
Good Luck!! xx
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwe have been dating for just over 5 years now and she is 27 me 29
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A
female
reader, brklynsis81  +, writes (31 October 2008):
 You don't mention how long the relationship has been going on. I think that is a pretty important element of reasonableness. But I think she is being straightforward in her feelings about it at any rate. Why would you want someone to move in with you who didn't feel ready to?
Ask her why she doesn't feel ready. If she says she needs to get to know you better, respect that. Some people just need more time than others. Maybe she is still dealing with the hurt of a past relationship. Or maybe she has personal or religious reasons for not wanting to move in. Regardless, you need to approach the conversation with the spirit of understanding, not confrontation. Some women just enjoy the independence of being on their own. If that is the case and it is a problem for you, you would probably be best off to move on.
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (31 October 2008):
 How long have you been dating and how old is your girlfriend? There are many reasons people dont move in together, work, family, location. Could be lots of reasons. I dont see how anyone can comment with very little info.
C xxxxxx
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