A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:when i am frustrated I have a tendency to scribe, i mean sending out sms and letters and notes... to the people especially the ones i am dating. What i have realised is that the more i scribe is the more i push them away, or its the more they do not pay attention. This makes me to be really frustrated. I do try to talk them out as well, but they just keep quiet and never give me any response or they would say im hurting them why is that.What i wish for is for a person to be sensitive to understand me fully that when i expect them to do something and they aren't sensitive it really hurts me....I am good at picking up if the person doesn't feel loved and I can easily react to reassure a person and never defend myself, why cant other people notice when im really hurting.... I wish the guy im dating could read my sms and texts and realise that im hurting and i need his attention
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female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (24 May 2007):
 Hi sweetness,
I liked everyone else's advice here, I'm just going to add in another little tid bit. Maybe when you're feeling frustrated, you should write out a letter instead and then wait until you can talk to your man face to face - or at least on the phone. SMS's aren't really the best way to work out problems. For some, they're kind of obnoxious, and some things get bent out of context.
I think if you want a guy to take your feelings seriously, you should present your feelings in a serious way. I don't think that text messages are the medium to do that.
It sounds like you're a sweet, sensitive girl. When you're really frustrated, write out an angry letter (it always helps me) and then when you get to see your man - THEN voice your concerns.
Good luck, sweetness.
xxIndia
A
female
reader, torngirl  +, writes (24 May 2007):
I do exactly the same, and it often is received as a 'rant', but all I'm doing is saying how upset I am because of something and trying to say what it is and why so they know.. yet even when you do that and a guy knows what it is, they dont change it. Well, mine doesnt, which is why im thinking of ending it, but then i will be wondering if i did the right thing or if i partly made things worse by my reactions...its a tough one hun
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (24 May 2007):
 We are talking MEN here. They can be very dense when it comes to a lady's very sensitive nature. However if you come across as too needy they sometimes will close right up. Intense emotion can scare the bejammers out of some guys. I think your expectations may be a tad high and because of that you will constantly feel let down by others. What you need to do is learn some ways to comfort yourself so you aren't so reliant on others. Sometimes repeating a phrase that you find comforting in times of stress is helpful. You'll have to find this mechanism for yourself but make sure it is harmless. Good luck dear.
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A
male
reader, DV1 +, writes (24 May 2007):
 Guys aren't always good at picking up on things. If you have to, say it really loud, but in his presence. If you get his attention, he'll listen. You have to remind him that you have needs, and that he's not fulfilling them.
DV1
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