A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I met a man on facebook about 5 months ago. We have never met in real life. But we are very close to each other. We have shared everything about our past--his ex's and my ex. I told him about my ex, who blackmails me with pics that he had taken of me long ago.Recently, he asked for a pic of my vagina. I refused. Now he is accusing me of being a hypocrite. He thinks I'm acting too coy. He says I enjoyed sex with my ex, which is why I have photos with him. So I have no right to be coy now. He has decided to break up with me, but says we should remain friends.Should I remain friends with him? Does he deserve my friendship?
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broke up, facebook, my ex, vagina Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2013): hey u r alrady have ex. after breakup again u meet another in Facebook.not direct.again u sent ur photos.this will take to in lot of problems.so go away like these things.feel better.
just leave him
all the best
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2013): "I met a man on facebook about 5 months ago. We have never met in real life. But we are very close to each other"
Sorry I just dont get this... how can you be close to someone who you have no idea who they are??????
This guy was just trawling the net looking for gullible women to send him pictures. Be very wary of meeting up with these 'amazing' guys on the internet - they will be anything YOU want them to be just so that you will let down your guard.
Try and meet some real-life people instead.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2013): He certainly does not deserve your friendship! This guy is a creep who seems to think that since you have sex before you now need to have sex with anyone who asks you. Not a chance! I'd stop all contact and forget about him.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (12 February 2013):
 You ask: "...Should I remain friends with him? Does he deserve my friendship?"
The answers are "no," and "no." Any other input from me - or anyone else - is superfluous......
Good luck....
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks, everyone! Yeah, it was a terrible mistake. Will keep what you all said in mind for the future. I guess I also need to go to a counselor to get rid of this tendency to get played by men. I think that is the root of the problem.
Thank, everyone for helping me sort this out in my head.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (12 February 2013):
 He definitely does NOT deserve another minute of your time.
He tried to re-victimize you and his behavior is scurrilous and disgusting.
Do not give another chance to try to manipulate you.
And here is a lesson to remember in the future: protect yourself online more diligently.
You have no need to discuss past mistakes (re distasteful pictures). Leave that in the past.
Go forth with a greater sense of who you are and who and what you deserve.
You have suffered one sleaze before.
Never fall for another sleeze again.
Put online guys out of your mind,
Block your ex online guys from contacting you.
De-activate your Facebook - follow the FB instructions to do that.
Then look first if you can get in touch with real people by doing some volunteering in your community with a recognized charity. It will give you confidence and bring you in touch with better nicer people (other volunteers)
Then choose to focus on real people who you get to know in real life.
And never put up with sleazy men (like those you have suffered) ever again.
He definitely deserves NOTHING but contempt, don't even waste your time to say goodbye. He is the hypocrite. And as low as a snake or a cockroach.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (12 February 2013):
 WHAT a creep! Please do not give in to his sleazy requests and no matter what he says, refuse to even be friends with him. How dare he ask your for pics of your vagina and then accuse YOU of being coy? This shows what he wants from you and you should run for the hills. The world is full of all kinds of really bizarre people, learn to say NO and stay away from them. And in future, don't befriend unknown people on Facebook and certainly don't share your intimate details with them, you never really know what kind of trouble you could get in. Come on OP, you're in the age group of 30-35, how can you be this naive? Of course he doesn't deserve your friendship or anything for that matter! Un-friend him and block him immediately.
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A
female
reader, when nothing goes right go left  +, writes (12 February 2013):
 He definitely doesn't deserve anything from you because he is a creep with bad intentions who has tried to emotionally blackmail so you should end everything with him.
Hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (12 February 2013):
 Way to go in saying NO!
You obviously learned your lesson from your past experience with your EX, that doesn't give the new guy the RIGHT to call you coy or make demands..
DROP HIM like it's hot! He is not a friend nor do I think he ever will be. He will forever HOLD your past over your head to try and emotionally blackmail you into doing what he wants. What an asshat!
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A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (12 February 2013):
 You have every right to be coy, especially since your ex blackmailed you with the pics he took. Why be friends with him? Better to have a clean break.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 February 2013):
 good for you for refusing an inappropriate request from a creep.
and he's a creep for even asking....
I would not only not be friends with him, I would unfriend him on facebook, and block him. if he has your phone number block his number on your phone too...
what you did in the past with past boyfriends has NO bearing on what you do in the present with him.
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (12 February 2013):
 Hi
No, he is definately not a friend, he is a chancer.Just block him.
You have done exactly the right thing refusing,in future don't 'share' so much intimate and personal information with a total stranger.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2013): No. Cut that guy off and NOW. For starters, stop investing so much time with a picture and words on a computer screen and go out and meet a real person in real life. This guy could be anyone and he is only telling you what you want to read and he spends all his free time likely involved the same way with various women.After five months you have never met this person and you are sharing so much personal information with him? That is so risky and incredibly irresponsible, especially for a woman. Thank goodness you knew something was wrong with sending a picture of something he could masturbate to...freak. And that was only the beginning...if you fell for it, the things he would begin requesting would get worse for you. You didn't, so now he's bored and moving on...do the same and delete him.Use dating sites for dating and leave facebook for socializing with people you really know. This is really becoming a problem and these kind of stories are rampid.When you connect with someone on-line, for potential relationship, on a DATING SITE you should meet within a week or two, in a public place for coffee or a drink to find out if there is any physical attraction or chemisty. If the person keeps putting it off, it's not going to actually happen, just move on.
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