A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hey guys! well, im 15 and i have NEVER kissed anyone. i have someone in mind but im too afraid that my parents would find out some how or someone would tell. im not aloud to date yet so that means no dates! what do i do? do the guys tell people or their guy friends? my mom doesn't let me really get alone with any guy, so it's kind of a difficult situation. plus my parents watch me like hawks. please help! Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, The B man +, writes (9 July 2010):
Id like to say that its perfectly fine to not have kissed someone at your age. Im 17 and I have not kissed a girl yet(Its not that I cant, its that I want to wait till I actually find a girl who I feel I can have a long term relation with and be happy so my first kiss is...a little more 'special', if you will).
A
female
reader, Becca64 +, writes (22 June 2010):
Talk to your parents about it, let them know youll be responsible, you wont take things too far and obviously wont have sex until it is legal and even then not until youre ready (but you seem really sensible and nt thinking about this, just felt i should mention it)
All you seem to want is a normal teenagers relationship, speak to them. be reasonable, dont get upset with them. Just calmly explain your point of view.
But dont worry hun, i didnt kiss anyone until i was 16 and actually regretted the first guy i kissed a bit.
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A
male
reader, IHateWomanBeaters +, writes (22 June 2010):
I honestly am a huge proponent of being able to date.
You seem like a smart person. As long as the person you want to kiss is not some stupid fucking criminal or someone over 18. As long as he is a nice person vs a guy who is desirable because of his status.
If he will treat you with respect and you KNOW this, then I say lie. Don't have sex. Don't kiss on the first date. Be reasonable and cautious. Get to know him for him first, as opposed to getting to know him for his status or looks.
When you are 20, fine, do that. But, when you are a teenager, you do not want to go down that path of sex and getting involved with a guy too quickly. It will really harm you. Same thing for a guy, it would also harm him.
Don't be guilted or manipulated into anything. If you truly know that you are incharge and that you have the right to not have sex. If you know you won't be guilted into it. If you know that you can be safe and not have sex at all, etc., at least for a while, until you KNOW him well.
I say try telling your parents. If you know that won't work, then just do it anyway. Who cares. Honestly, parents that are over protective have daughters that go off the deep end sexually.
I am a bouncer at a club, I see these women all the time. I am into really hard sex, and I reject 95% of the women that come up to me, because they want it for the wrong reason. They end up getting abused because they get sling shotted into sex by controlling parents.
Be yourself. SET YOUR LIMITS.
1. No sex until you are really ready.
2. No drinking or doing drugs.
3. No kissing until you are ready.
4. Your body, your choice.
5. If he says, I love you baby. ABUSER
6. If he says, I think your male friends are bad. ABUSER
7. If he says, I don't think you should wear that, its too revealing, etc. ABUSER
I worked at a women's shelter. I am a bouncer. I go out of my way to find woman beaters, have them arrested, and then talk their girlfriends out of the relationship. I have spent the last 4 years of my life doing this stuff.
If you want to get involved with a guy, you MUST be responsible.
If you aren't responsible, I promise you, you will regret it.
If you have any questions, you can message me.
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A
female
reader, Elydiese +, writes (22 June 2010):
I think you should have a talk with your parents and ask them about dating when they were your age and at 15 you should start having fun experimenting with boys, kissing wise i mean not sexually, going on dates and having fun. Tell them that all you want is to have fun and be happy they'll want that for you too
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