A
male
age
36-40,
*atinthebasket
writes:so...i kinda wanna have a threesome but how do i ask my wife if she wants to get involved? this could be a touchy area.i think it would be so hot to be with two girls but yeah asking the wife....
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2007): dont be a fool,your wife is more important than a fantasy.get it out of ur mind,what if the shoe was on the other foot,what would you do????
A
female
reader, Gwyneth  +, writes (2 March 2007):
 Let me tell you a little story. Once upon a time, there was a married woman with three kids who decided with her husband that they should have a threesome with another woman. The married woman finds a gorgeous, single lesbian online and the two women meet for drinks. The married woman decides she wants the gorgeous lesbian to herself and leaves hubby out of the scenario all together. The married woman and the lesbian have one night of hot sex and that's that. When the married woman goes home to hubby after hot sex with lesbian, hubby has moved all his soon-to-be-ex-wife's stuff out and wants a divorce. The married woman calls the lesbian and asks her what to do? The lesbian replies: "Work it out with your husband, honey." Click. Dial-tone. Good-bye.The couple got divorced and the lesbian is writing this response.My advice: Homos and heteros don't mix. And, even if you think you know what you are (homo or hetero) and what your wife is (homo or hetero), until you've tried it, you really don't know. So, take care, my friend. Your wife might end up liking the woman better than you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007): dont think its a good idea.. if it were me i would get hurt.. and rather disgusted then mayb (just mayb) Id clup you in your face, then most defnitly tell you to fuck off!!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007): Do you remember the episode in "Friends" where Ross' wife is thrilled by the prospect of a threesome, picks out the girl and dumps Ross for her...
Loved Suorpio's answer.
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A
male
reader, Ponungalungb +, writes (1 March 2007):
 I was going to add my 2 cents but I read Suorpio, and he pretty summed up what I was going to say. How would you react if your wife said she wanted to invite a man to join you? I think that will put the lid on your "hot" idea.
I've had threesomes with women that I wasn't in relationships with (when I was young and single) . . . and yes, it is "so hot". LOL. That's one of the things you only get to fantasize about once you're married. So forget about it. I'll keep my memories to myself. LOL.
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A
female
reader, Debs85  +, writes (1 March 2007):
i think this is a definate no no. i had a threesome and it is something i would never recommend it creates so many problems afterwards. women get very jealous and at the time everything may seem as if it is going well but afterwards you will get all of your wifes little niggles coming out like she thinks you had more enjoyment from the other woman or she thinks you spent more time on the other woman. you too may also feel different afterwards like my bf at the time got really upset as he felt i didnt care for him because i let him sleep with someone else and he felt i had more pleasure off the woman than i did with him. it was his idea and he was more than happy to go ahead with it but afterwards it was a different story and we are no longer together yet we had an extremely strong relationship before this. i would never advise this for anyone fantasies that involve other people should remain a fantasy.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007): Agrees with Eyes and Shandy here. If you have any doubts or have an inkling this may be a touchy subject with her--then all I have to say is don't even suggest it. If you said she liked the idea and wanted to try it, I'd have another answer for you. But this is clearly not the case. You are so very young, so perhaps a much needed mature, different outlook and appreciation of what marriage really is and what you share with your wife, one on one, is greatly needed here. Sex is not the end all, in marriage. It's building a good, solid life with trust, respect and honoring the companion you have chosen to love. Threesomes can destroy good unions. Injecting a third person into your marriage bed is just another way for you to cheat with your wife's permission. As everyone else suggested...keep this a fantasy.
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A
male
reader, R71 +, writes (1 March 2007):
You could share it with your wife as a fantasy (and only that). If your relationship is strong enough, during intimate moments you could both participate in this fantasy.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (1 March 2007):
 I think it's a dumb idea and I think your wife may be totally crushed by just knowing you would like to involve another woman in your sex life. Keep it to yourself, you can dream about it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007): Having a fantasy is a lot different from doing the actual thing. don't put your marriage at risk for the sake of something which might only last one night, if that.Talk to your wife and let her know how you feel and what you want, but be prepared for her to say no and please leave it at that. It is very destructive.
Take care
xx
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (1 March 2007):
 You need to talk to her about it, suggest it one night when asking her if she has any fantasies. If she hesitates about it at all then I'd leave well alone. Exciting as it seems, it can be the beginning of the end for a marriage. Is a "hot" night with two women really worth risking your marriage for?
In my opinion fantasy is one thing, reality is very much another! It's NEVER the same as your fantasy, trust me on that one.
Eve
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2007): Try and put yourself in your wife's shoes. What if she turned around one day and wanted to have a three-way with another man and you? Would you be shocked? Would you feel inadequate? Would you worry about her running off with the other guy? You need to have flawless, airtight, abso-fucking-lutely perfect responses for all these reactions, because you may indeed be treading in dangerous territory. Maybe your wife is adventurous enough to warm up to the idea right away, but you'd better play it safe. Be advised these conversations can also segue into something your partner's been dying to ask you to try, so try not to blanch when she puts in the request for a diaper fantasy.
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