A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Hey before I get started please don't attack me because I know I was the asshole. Ok so I'll call say her names D. D worked with me for 16 months.she didn't work in my dept but we friendly.She was single but I was going out with two girls that didn't know about D or each other.Ok I was a dog.D asked me if I was married or going steady and I lied saying I was available and eventually asked her to go steady with me.I liked her the most but wasn't ready to finish with the other two girls so you have it I played around secretly on G.G found out and the rest can be figured out.D ignores me al over.I sae her at the mall and walked toward because I wanted to apologize to her.I stopped going out with the two girls the day D found out I was cheating and I haven't tried to find other girls.I didn't realize how 5 was the best girl I went out with plus I didn't see I love her until the day she saw me with the one of the girls.I've been depressed.I have found my future wife and she's D.what I need to ask is how can I get D to look at me and give me even a couple seconds so I can have a entrance to show her my remorse and how I have changed.I want to work for her trust. How do I go about all of this when she avoids me all over. I will do whatever it takes to repent for her trust and hand in marriage.thanks.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2011): if she's a smart girl she'll won't give one more second of her time
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2011): You blew it. Get over it.
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A
female
reader, failwulfe +, writes (8 January 2011):
k, hope u dont mind my answereing a question with another question.
what made you end up dating two girls at the same time in the first place.
is there some kind of self doubt or fears (ending up alone, etc.) that maybe made u feel that being sure that u had a woman made u adequate
maybe growing up w on parent(? dad maybe never committed to mom?
we are not a perfect species by far
we have subconsieous issues that make u do crazy shit man, but were not aware of them because we dont see them.
but as a woman (granted im not very old but ive studied a lot of psycology and and spent a lot of time trying to pry into the human brain.
i did this because of the "man-woman relationship" ad why it soesnt seem to work.
I can put this simply women in general want to fell like the "only one" to a man to really open up and offer allthey can and when they do its pretty cool.
but feeling decieved makes us hurt, confused andn we feel like,
well useable worthless garbage, and will never feel appreciated.
my relationship w my husband started out kinda like that.
he wasnt single, we worked together, i thought he was just awesome.
he had a girlfreind that seemed like a monsterous dragon so hed broken up with her
-so he told me
but here is how i felt, so this might be how she felt:
i kinda felt like i was beig kept on some back burner, being kept a litle warm while he waited to see if the relationship he had brewing grew cold and tasted like shit or smoldered into a hot hot steamy cheese soup ( or whatever).
he kindof had that habit of stringing along more thatn on chick at a time to test them out.
a lot of guys do that so im not picking on you
(like i said before there is some kind of explaination for the crap we do)
but we need to know that all of your time and effort is focused on us, because deep down do you really care about something if youre half assing it, or keeping up with something just to have something while you wait for what you really want.
i dont really have tiem to explain further but youu NEED time alone by yourself to work on you and find that ur okay on your own, then she needs to see this too. (probably for a litle while too, before you try to woo her again)
if you want someone it cannot be beacause you think it woukd be good for you but to want her becouse of her, if that makes sense?
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A
female
reader, SillyB +, writes (8 January 2011):
I hope she will not give you a second chance. If she is smart she wont!
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A
male
reader, doublejack +, writes (8 January 2011):
You cheated, so she doesn't trust you anymore. The harsh reality is you've probably blown this opportunity forever. That's what happens to "players" when they find someone they later realize they wanted something real with.
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