A
male
age
36-40,
*hiner
writes:I recently broke up with my girlfriend after 1.5 years. We had had 3 break-ups through-out the relationship, all my fault, she caught me flirting with some girl when i was walking out of class, then she caught me sending e-mails back and forth with a co-worker, and the last time it was me because i felt suffocated. The thing is that I felt as if she was very needy, when we started dating i lived like 10 minutes away from her house and we were good until about 7 months into the relation, i moved and we were seeing each other every week-day, we work together.I had stopped going down for the week-ends and that became an issue the past month and a half, since i decided to drop out of school she has done nothing but criticize that she doesn't see us getting married w/ out me going to school. I came clean and told her that i saw this as a relationship (it was both of ours first serious relationship) and that we were still young, i know for fact that i was an ass often, and i feel bad because she kept coming back, i'm scared i hurt heris it something she can get over?she even called me after i SERIOUSLY ended it and asked me to get back with her, she asked if i was "testing" her love, when i said no, she got all upset and asked me if they're was someone else. I told her it was better that we ended in goos terms than continue in a bad relation where we didn't respect each other. We see each other everyday b/cos we work together, and she acts "fine" when i talk to her but her eyes have been teary the whole week.Am i a bad person for hurting her and ending the relation? i can't help but feel guilty b/cus i was able to move on so fast.Sorry for the length
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female
reader, missmel34  +, writes (14 December 2007):
 Theres no good way to break up with a person. It hurts like hell. Its wonderful that you are feel such empathy for her. Examining who you were in a past relationship makes the next one better.
She will recover, we always do.
And like you, she will be wiser for the next time round.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2007): Oh of course she will get over it. I am sure she will be just fine. I mean sure it hurts when you break up with someone, at first. Every single person feels that way at some point or another. Someday you will too.
But don't worry about her. She sounds like a very cool, strong girl. Give her a couple of weeks and I am sure she will have bounced back and may even have a new boyfriend by then. So you have nothing to worry about.
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