A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:my ex boyfriend is now my close friend and he has told me he is going to use his girlfriend and i said to her have you ever thort he is going to use you? and she said no he isn't like that. and i said he is a user a player and a liar he is everything like tha. i should know ive been through it. and she said ok ill ask him. and i said noo! dont because then it could cause shit and he will think i've said things. and she said well why have u said that then. i said ask him if you think he is going to use you, but if u dont, dont ask him. and she said ok im not gona ask him and i said dont let me change what u would say and what u wunt....... im scared because i dont want him knowing ive said anything to her because he could fall out with me and we're really close friends. What can I say to her to stop her from asking him!!please this is an emergancy!!!! Should I say " i said what i said yesterday cos thats what it felt like for me wen i did stuff with him it could be different with you 2 tho.. i woudn't say that 2 him imagine wot he would think then" .. Should i say that?? HELP!!
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female
reader, neonpinkngooey  +, writes (20 July 2007):
 hm... i don't think you should have said that to her. there is a code of conduct that needs to take place between friends, under most circumstances. keep your mouth shut. you could have told your ex that you think his intentions are wrong, instead of bringing her into it. but, i guess we can't change that. so, what i suggest is that you call her up in private, and ask her not to say anything to him. again. tell her that the reason you said that is because you like her, and you don't want her to get hurt. but then, you realized that he isn't like that. so there is nothing to worry about. tell her that you are good friends with him now, and he seems to have good intentions. unfortunately, if you don't want her to say anything to him, then you'll have to lie, and make her feel that you didn't mean anything you said.or you can just not bother with it. if your ex had the audacity to hurt you while you were in a relationship, what is compelling you to preserve a friendship with him? besides, it doesn't seem as if you are over him, or over what he did to you. you indirectly attempted to break him and his girlfriend up. the best solution for you is to discontinue your friendship for now. you should take a break from your ex, and let yourself heal, before you try to ruin anymore of his relationships.
A
male
reader, leonard j.Douglas  +, writes (19 July 2007):
In the first place you call your Ex,who has used you a close friend. Gee! some friend, "I say". You wouldn't be asking this question if he were out of your life, where he should be. Why would you want a user, a player or a liar as a close friend? If you had moved on with your life, he wouldn;t be a part of it,nor would you now be in the mess that you have gotten yourself into. We all learn from our mistakes,but then some of us are slow learner's who hand on to bad relationships. His new gf will end up being used no doubt, but then as they say, "Love is blind" So stay out of his life and out of his relationships. And get on with your own life.
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