A
male
age
26-29,
*amo Swag
writes:I am in love with my cousin , she is my mother sister daughter.I afraid to tell her I am not sure she love me.i'm afraid to tell her because we're so close to each other and i don't want to ruin this if she told she doesn't love me back . I am Afraid if I tell her if she tell to her mom What should i do then? We both are the same age . Please give am an advice
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female
reader, chipmunk37  +, writes (17 August 2015):
 I looked up the law in your country regarding in family relationships and it is legal for you to marry your cousin thus it is legal for you to have a relationship. It is now really a matter of how your cousin feels about you. Has she given any sign she might return your feelings, and please, be honest with yourself, has she ever treated you as more than just her cousin? If she hasn't then although it may be hard and painful it would be best to keep your feelings to yourself. If you tell her how you feel and she doesn't feel the same it could damage your relationship with her in the family.
A
male
reader, IanHenryCooper +, writes (15 August 2015):
 In the UK your relationship is perfectly legal; I imagine it would also be fair dinkum in Oz?
Why? Well, the key point here is that recent research (actually, now quite well established rather than new) has shown that there is no greater likelihood of birth defects from a first-cousin relationship than there would be from any other pairing.
The various religious organisations have been responsible for the disapproval, based not on genuine knowledge and research, but for reasons of control and bigotry.
I suspect that my ratings will plummet as a result of this post, but that is because these are unwelcome truths for some groups with vested interests.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2015): You are first cousins, and that might cause some problems for
you down the road. You are young and your feelings are what they are. She can't love you like she would love someone who is unrelated. You are too closely related by blood to be in-love; so you will have to keep how you feel to yourself.
It might upset other family members who may decide to separate you; if they feel you have inappropriate feelings.
Just hide them inside. They will change over time. You're going through puberty and coming of age; and you're feeling a crush, which is fine. It's just that your crushes are better felt for girls who are not related to you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2015): She does love you back, but as her cousin - family - blood - not a potential boyfriend because that's what you are - cousins, blood, family - not a potential couple. This is infatuation and most people get a crush on a family member they admire and are close to, but it's inappropriate to act on it.
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A
male
reader, Garbo  +, writes (15 August 2015):
 Don't say anything because it is incestual advance and it is unwelcome, morally and legally. Deal with your infatuation for what it is...and it for sure isn't love. Learn to distinguish between infatuation and love by noting how you feel right now, and realizing that not every infatuation should be pursued nor does it mean love. People always experience infatuation, at your age more so then later, but they also realize that such infatuations are temporary and that their point is to alert us as to which qualities we would like to see in a partner with whom we will eventually settle with. Your cousin is not a person with whom you will ever settle.
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