A
female
age
30-35,
*francy
writes:hey there friends.. i met a guy a month and half ago, but hes getting too far he want to know everything around me even they way my exes treated me, i told him i am not comfortable with it but he says its nothing big.. if my phone goes off he complains like no body's business.. am getting tired of this already but i really love him and he treats me very nice.. the other thing is his tough rules that makes me sick.. i do not know want to do now and i want to marry this guy.. please help. how should i cope with this?
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female
reader, veronika  +, writes (12 May 2010):
 I personally don't think you should marry him. At least not yet. You've only been with him for 1.5 months - that's nothing.
Although, he doesn't sound like he'd be a very nice spouse; he sounds too controlling, and if that's something you're not comfortable with then why would you want to get married to someone who is like that? At the end of the day. you can't really change a person, the person has to change themselves.
A
male
reader, The Knight  +, writes (12 May 2010):
I really don't believe that this is the right guy for you, I think you see him as a little over keen and you've forgiven him for that but your ignoring those warning signs: If he's "bugging" you already then he certainly isn't the one for you. Also look at the way he reacts to when you phone goes off, he knows that your phone going off will take all the attention away from him, imagine being married to him and trying to stay in contact with your friends and family. Look and read the warning signs and you'll see what we're seeing: a controlling man.
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A
male
reader, lionelhutz  +, writes (12 May 2010):
One month isn't nearly enough time to know if you truly love someone and want to marry them. Furthermore, if he is making you unhappy, why are you staying with him? As time progresses, things will only get worse.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2010): Doesn't sound like you are very happy with this guy, who sounds like he is pressuring you. If you are tired of it already, what would it be like long term? If he won't listen to your needs, tell him he wouldn't suit you as a husband.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2010): Hello,
He sounds controlling. Do you have any information about his previous relationships etc? I'm sure your not the only woman he's behaved this way to.
I'm uncertain why you're wanting to get married without first trying to resolve these issues they'll only get bigger without rectifying them. If they can be fixed that is. Address to him you don't need to divulged every detail about your past. You're with him now and that's what counts. Sure we all have questions about our partners pasts, but we don't carry on about it.
Take your time before saying "I do" and making that huge commitment.
Good luck
;D
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (12 May 2010):
 You shouldn't have to "cope" with anything after knowing some guy 1 month! If he's bugging you already, then guess what, he's going really be bugging you after another month. Keep looking for that potential husband, this guy isn't cutting the cheese.
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A
male
reader, Boonridge McPhalify +, writes (12 May 2010):
 after a month and a half you cant know you want to marry someone. if you have already got issues with his behaviour then marriage is bad idea. it sounds like he is possesive and like the two of you have become very attached in a short space of time.
its sounds to me like you want to be married and this guy just happens to fit into your template, but things might not stay like that for long. wait for more time and see how you two get along before marrying.
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