A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello there,My ex and I have been seperated 6 months ago for the best. We have been meeting up every now and then trying to remain friends and he is seeing someone else right now. Only until recently, I managed to get something out of him and he finally admitted he had cheated on me after lying that he hadn't for 6 months.His reasons for lying is he doesn't want to lose me but I just can not forgive him.Obviously, I felt angry and I decided we can not be friends anymore. My question here is shall I return all his gifts that he had given me? Because I am planning to and I want to hurt him and I don't want his things to constantly remind me what a fool I had been.
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male
reader, Uncle Trev +, writes (19 January 2008):
May I suggest that you sell the things that he has given you and then either donate the proceeds to a charity he would not approve of or spend the money on something that he wouldn't approve of. It is a much better way as you gain out of the situation and by not returning the presents to him you do not give him the satisfaction of knowing that he has hurt you, which by what you have said seems to be the opposite of your intentions.
A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (19 January 2008):
 The proper time to return gifts to an ex is right after the break-up. If you have kept them all this time and suddenly want to give them back, it's going to appear petty, vengeful or just simply going to let him know that your feelings have been deeply hurt all over again. Frankly, I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing that he had any place in my heart at all. I know that these days, people seem reluctant to walk away from ex's, but it seems like a waste of emotional energy to try to remain friends with them, especially when it leads to a situation like this. You weren't "friends" to begin with, you were sweethearts, and I can't imagine that you would like your next boyfriend being "friends" with any of his ex's. Stop hanging out with him! All that this friendship has done for you is open up old wounds, and create a couple of new ones! Throw out all the things that he gave you, or give them to the Salvation Army.
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