A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:How can I tell my parents that me and my partner are trying for baby and will get a flat when the baby is born? My dad is quite old fasioned, he will probably go mad what should I do, Im excited if my partner gets pregnant because I love her lots and want to settle down with her. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, old dad +, writes (1 November 2008):
My son 17.Girlfriend 18.She is pregnant 18 week.My son who 17 he did good GCSE with 5A* and B's.Loving and sex with Girlfriend He did AS level 2Es and 1D.Hes UK visa end after 6 month.He have to say bye to girl and baby.We never support to him to go to uni with our money.Because as I understand.any young teen trying to rune their education and having fun with sex they will supper.older people got good experience in there all the life.But this little kids get experience from online and cinema.I feel sorry for this kids.sorry my English not first language
A
female
reader, Secret Teller  +, writes (21 July 2008):
 becoming a parent is not easy and your teen years will never be the same if you have a baby. what are you and your lover going to do if she gets pregnant and her parents or your parents will not help take care of the baby. are you guys going to drop out of school just to support this baby, 5 dollars an hour will not buy all the things your baby needs, things aren't cheap these days. but please don't get me wrong a baby is a wonderful gift sent by god but are you prepared to support this baby. please give me feedback.
best of luck, hope everything you hoped for comes true and you live a wonderful life with your dreamgirl.
p.s. this was not just a stupid question i answered, this is a important love/drama story. this is a new chapter in yours and your sweethearts life. make the right and best choice noone can help you with that but yourself.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2008): Its not advisable in this day and age to become parents so soon, and for good reason. Its a million times more difficult out there, job wise and housing wise, then it ever was for your parents... true its not like we had to suffer through WWII, but still... one word INFLATION.
But stranger things have happened, lesser people then you have gone on to be great parents after falling pregnant in their teenage years.
It's your decision in the end, but be aware it will be a bit of an uphill ride and unless you can say to anyone that money isn't an issue and no expense is to be spared... you'll find it rough for a good while.
Flynn 24
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A
female
reader, sophie-lee +, writes (21 July 2008):
Hello..Well I do concider age and stuff but if you and your girlfriend are happy in a stable realtionship then hey ! i can say you sound just like my boyfriend apart from hes a little older he also has a good income with a good job, and hats off to you for been one in a million lads our age that actually have thier head screwed on, basically i dont think you and your girlfriend should tell your family your are TRYING for a family becasue this i feel would be bad as you said your father is old fashioned this could mean to your family stopping you seeing each other letting you have privacy or even sleeping at each others houses this for a realtionship does not help however i'm NOT saying keep secrets why not wait and see what materilises out of you and your girlfriend trying and cross hurdles as they approach its you and your girlfriend you should be most concerned about your parents have lived thier lives now its your turn good luck...x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2008): DONT DO IT!!!
I fell pregnant at 20 so that I could move out and be with my boyfriend. Its my greatest regret, I miss the times we had alone not having to stress about cash, babysitters etc. I feel resentful cause years partying and freedom are now gone. Id do anything to have had someone talk me out of it. Listen to me, find a baby between 2 and 6 months old to look after for one month, you'll quickly change your mind. If you really are in love, you dont need a baby to prove it. Wait til you're like, forty I'd say. Thats what I'd do if I could relive my past.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2008): £1000, wont even pay for rent, food and clothes, let alone all the stuff a baby needs. As I said, it's your choice. If you love your girlfriend I suggest you wait untill you have a big pot of savings to take care of her and the baby. It's about £400 for a pram, nappies are £10 a time and babies use a lot. Take a look in mothercare's, or argos and check out the prices. You think you've got a lot of money, but the baby and rent will quickly eat this up.
You love her, she loves you, you want kids, what's the hurry. Don't you want to be able to afford the best for your child. Why not build up some savings so when you tell your dad, you'll also be able to prove to him, that you have enough money to provide for any children that you decide to have.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2008): Are you working, do you have enough money to pay rent. You will not get a flat straight away, it dosen't work like that anymore in the UK. Your partner will either get put in a mother and baby hostel, or will be offered bed-and-breakfast. As you know, we have a problem with housing in Britian, young girls who decide to get pregnant are no longer a top priority.
When the government offer her accomodation you will probably have to stay away. If she's working, she will have to give it up when she goes on maternity leave. You will have to support her, yourself and the baby as well. It will be difficult for her to work, because childcare costs a full weeks wage. Babies are very, very expensive. You better have plenty of money to help out. She will be tired, and grumpy and will probably go off sex. Your relationship will suffer hardship and you will find arguements break out. Babies need to be fed every 4 hours, but she will have to do this alone, as unless your very rich, you won't be able to stay with her in a government house. You will no longer be girlfriend and boyfriend, but you will be mum and dad. The baby will be the centre of your world, and you will find after a while that baby shit, and baby vomit get borring pretty fast.
You present aged 16-17 (overage) and currently living in the UK. Your an adult so what can I say. If you think your man enough to make a baby, surely your man enough to tell your dad that this is what you intend to do.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI do have a good job with £1000 income a month, I am in a suitable position, when did i tell you that i didnt have a job or qualifications I never said that so don't get your doubts up because of my age, i've got qualifications and a good job...
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A
male
reader, TheVirg +, writes (21 July 2008):
I think Emily just owned that question. I agree 100 percent, think about your future. athough your reasons may be good for wanting a baby, there are far more against them.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (21 July 2008):
"Dad, I know I'm not married and I don't have a good job and I haven't done any travelling or got a career or been to uni or done anything with my life, but I'm choosing to ruin it and limit myself for the next 20 years by having a baby. KTHXBYE!!"
If I seriously thought you were in a good position to raise a child then I would say go for it. Move out and do it.
How are you going to pay for this flat? You aren't old enough to have A-levels so I seriously doubt you have a job good enough to support a woman, a baby and pay rent and bills. Do you have the £1000 worth of deposit and advance rent and agent's fee?
How will you handle 3am feeds? Are you going to breastfeed or go on the bottle? What are your experiences with wiping poo up when you are hung over?
These are all reasonable questions that your dad is going to ask you... he's not being old fashioned, he probably just wanted more for you in life than for you to manage to shag a girl enough to get her pregnant, and then to sponge off the government for the rest of your life.
If you want to move out with your girlfriend then fine, then once you have both worked and got yourself in a good financial position then yeah, think about a baby.
Since you are not even living together, why get pregnant now?
If you really cared about your girlfriend and wanted the best start in life for your child you would wait till you could provide for it. You wouldn't just bring it into the world so you could get a council flat.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNo shes my partner
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A
female
reader, kr@zyb@by  +, writes (21 July 2008):
are you married
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