A
male
age
30-35,
*ndrew loves hali
writes:Hi, I'm 15 and my friend Hali and I decided not to be friends any more cause well it's a really long story so let's just say she liked me more than a friend and I didn't like her that way (cause I had a gf at the time) and I mean she's really pretty and smart and nice but I never liked her that way. Anyway she has became something she isn't. Everything that she hates is what she's become. 1: she didn't ever say any swear words but now she does all the time. 2: she used to get straight A's now she get C's and B's. 3: she acts like she hates me (and I know she doesn't), when her friends, well our friends are around. 4: she's staring to say mean things about people she doesn't even know like my ex Sedona. She says she's a bitch and stuff and she's not at all and I really want the old Hali back. Even though we aren't friends I still care for her and I don't want her to change evrything she is just cause of me. One of our friends told me she said she changed cause of ME :( now I feel guilty. How do I get her to see that she doesn't have to change for me, for anyone. I love her the way she is (used to be) help. Thanks for any help from anyone.
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male
reader, CrazyMind  +, writes (26 March 2009):
 hey Andrew. It seems like your rejection had a huge impact on her, and understandably you regret that she's changed because of you.
You've set your name as 'andrew loves hali' - can I assume that your feelings for her have changed?
My advice for you is to talk to her. Try approaching her directly, ask if you can talk to her. Maybe invite her out (or around to yours) for a coffee - if she says she's busy, ask her for a time that she's not busy - try and do things on her time.
If she refuses to talk, maybe try and get a mutual friend that you can trust involved. E.g. them getting her to go to -wherever-, and you arrive 5 minutes after she does. If you do this, do it outside of a school environment - otherwise she can just run off and jump into a group of friends.
If you like her - let her know. Ask her why she's changed, and also let her know that you miss the old her, and that you want to be friends. It may take some time, but just keep working at it, and hopefully she'll come round to the idea.
I wish you all the best with this.
Also, I offer you my full support. I don't know what help I may be able to be, but if you want to keep in contact, private message me.
- Crazy
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