A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I want to get married and have kids. I am now 31 and have only managed to hold down 1 relationship for 10 months (I dumped him) and the last one for 3 months (which I suspect was a rebound relationship on his part; he dumped me). They both ended on really really trivial issues that could have been sorted out very easily. I think that is a shockingly bad record of relationships. I very rarely meet men I gel with and when I do it goes wrong. I can't fathom out why my love life is such a disaster.I know I have this unrealistic vision of the fairytale ending and of course real life isn't like that. Relationships are very hard work, and yet I still have this vision in my head that it must be a fairytale otherwise I am settling for second best. Both of the men I have had 'relationships' with I could have married but after the first flush of romance, the reality sets in and although I am totally into the other person, I find it boring and then I worry they'll find me boring. I am always 100% faithful.I know people who go into relationship after relationship with no problem at all and yet I took ages to get over mine. How do you sustain a relationship when the first flush goes? I despair of ever finding a man! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2007): Relax and stop beating yourself up. You will meet someone who will love and cherish you for who you really are. You just haven't met that person YET! STOP worrying and be yourself. Go out with your family and friends and enjoy life, being young and single. We are not all in a race to meet someone. Life is very rewarding in a relationship but it is also great being single and being able to do your own thing.
Take care and i am sure you will meet someone in the future, just be yourself.
xx
A
male
reader, home_land  +, writes (2 April 2007):
 hello
i think you are right some how ,love and relationship without romance is not nice to me at least ,and to have a man who can do that is not that easy ,but what you can do pack your stuff leave the city spend one year alone in the desert and around there it might be that you will find the man ,hey romance and wisdom are far away from people .and i have done that.
good luck
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