| A
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Hello everyone. I've been married for about 15 months now. Before I got married, my husband and I had made the decision to wait until we were married to have sex because we wanted our 1st time to be special. Even while we were dating, he was a very big on romance which really made me fall for him. When we got married and began really being intimate, he would always try to make things as romantic and as comfortable as possible for me. However, after about 9 months of marriage, all of that romance stopped. For the past 6 months, he'd come home and say that he needs to relieve some stress and he'll practically force himself on me. Before, he was very concerned with pleasuring me and making sure I was satisfied but now it's all about his immediate gratification and nothing else. If I tell him no or explain to him that I'm not in the mood or simply don't want to have sex with him, he'll tell me that it's my "wifely duty" and other things like that until I really start to feel bad and give in. I just don't understand the sudden character change. I want my husband back to the way he was. I don't know what to do. Help?
View related questions:
in the mood Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Ldu  +, writes (30 September 2010):
I say you sit down with him and tell him exactly what you wrote here. He will have to answer and if not he will atleast hear you out and possibly feel bad and see hes been doing wrong. good luck.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 September 2010): This is bizarre, worrisome.
I agree with TasteofIndia, do not ignore this, you need to figure this one out.
I assume he is young like you?
This sounds like a serious mental health issue.
...............................
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (29 September 2010):
 Whoa, this is a major issue. He is forcing himself on you, telling you that it's your "wifely duty" and that you have to comply? You should not be guilted into sex, and he should not feel so powerful over you that he feels he is entitled to you sexually. This is something you should not feel okay with.
I think you should go see a marriage counselor, a therapist, maybe a pastor or somebody that you feel comfortable with and explain what has been happening. This is a problem not to be taken lightly or ignored. You need to stand up for yourself and your needs and take initiative to solve this. And remember - no means no. Maybe he needs to learn that. Don't give in if you do not want to have sex with him.
Good luck!
...............................
|
