A
female
age
30-35,
*wincess_titi
writes:I've been going out with my boyfriend for the past six months, but before we were going out we were good friends and introduced him to my parents. After 3 months i told my mum i was going out with him and she got angry, not because i have a b/f but because he is black (im indian btw) and not good looking, she said i should leave him and told her i did when really i wasn't. Recently someone grasssed on me saying they saw me with a guy and my mum knew who it,she got angry and came home shouting at me even though im 19, but she doesn't know that i love him, she doesnt how much inlove we are...i need help in how to let my mum know how much i love him, because me and my mum don't talk about b/f stuff. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Feanix +, writes (5 October 2008):
 Firstly sweetheart i just gotta say who's life are you living yours or your mums? Its the twenty first century and I dont really see the problem with inter racial relationships...were all human we got the same parts. Whats it matter what he looks like its the inside that counts. Your mum doesnt like this guy fair enough but you do so if it really is love then remain friends for now and maybe one day when you can leave home and stand on your own two feet you can be together? Sorry this sounds a little cruel but I just gotta say Fuck those other answers if you two are serious about each other then remain friends sort out a career leave home and get together then because even though its your life its your mums house so its her rules. But dont dispair just get out of your mums house and live YOUR life and NOT hers.
A
male
reader, FETSEA  +, writes (5 October 2008):
Firstly, interracial marriages are not yet an expected aspect with parents.
Secondly, you have known him 3 months, and your mother met him as a friend of yours. How many times has she met him?
Thirdly, age 19 does not yet, make you a judge of characters, to conclude that you have found the ideal.
MUMS DO NOT TELL EVERYTHING.THEY DO NOT TRANSPOSE THEIR THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU, TO YOU. THEY MULL, OVER AND OVER AGAIN."HER BURDEN OF YOU, YOUR LIFE, YOUR FUTURE HAS JUST BEGUN.
At 19, you feel you have arrived.VERY GOOD confidence. But, stark reality of life, is yet to be experienced. So, be a good daughter. Don't tell lies, ridicule mum, or play smart games. FRIENDSHIP WITH ANYONE IS OK. Your mother allowed. RELATIONSHIP is different. Whatif,in the next few months, you meet a person at an aunty's house, and he bowls you? You are 19. Do not rush. Have plenty of friens. Mix as much to size up and understand adults. Tell mum, he is a friend, be not seen in his companionship alone, think ways to have him at your place,for mum's second evaluation. (you blew mum's trust, so it is going to be dificult.though mum's are good frgivers. No games please)
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A
female
reader, freebird  +, writes (4 October 2008):
 Hey there,
I am from India. I know what is happening in your case. brownskinned people are likely to show more racism than whites. So I guess you will have to live with your mom to some extent. A possible way out is to calmly talk to your mom about how much you love him. If she loves you, she will eventually understand.
i guess indian moms are more likely to resent a boyfriend, a black boyfriend makes things worser.
Anyway, never lie or silence yourself becuase that will only makes things worser.
goodluck
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