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male
age
,
anonymous
writes: Dear Cupid,I have a wonderful relationship with a wonderful woman. we truly enjoy each others company in and out of the bedroom. The problem is, I have this fantasy/fetish that i would like my lover to dominate me! I would love it for her to whip my butt when I disobey her and make me her sex slave. The problem is, I am scared to ask her about this for fear of losing what we have. What should I do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, chachacha  +, writes (7 March 2007):
I agree with the others and have just one additional point to make:
What might lose her would be if, when you have finally expressed your desires, if she really really does not want to do it, if you cannot cope with that.
Relationships are all about compromise, and one of the compromises you might need to make is that your fantasy remains just a fantasy. Just bear that in mind........
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (7 March 2007):
 Hey sweetness,
I loved all the other advice given to you. Here's my two bits... maybe you could ask her if it would be okay if you loosely tied her up with a scarf. That's a little intro... and then you could ask her if she'd tie you up with the scarf. If she's into that, maybe you could ask her if she'd like to take it a little father next time (be sure to tell her how sexy it was and how great it felt to be tied up).
Easing into it seems like a good idea. Then you can tell her reactions to the smaller things. For instance, if she doesn't want to be tied up or let you tied up, she's probably not going to go for the spanking.
When you have sex do you ever grab her booty? Does she seem into it? If she's reciprocating, that's a good head start...
What I wouldn't do is overwhelm her with your request. "Hey babe, I know we've been having fun making love, but I kinda want you to dominate me, spank me and make me your sex slave." - that might be a little scary if she's never been exposed to that kind of thing before. So, ease yourself into things and I think she might get into it if you take it slow.
Good luck and have fun!
xxIndia
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A
female
reader, AngelofLove +, writes (7 March 2007):
 Perhaps you next flirt with her, bring to the conversation the spanking bit as a joke and watch her reaction. If she is "throws a fit", then it may be a sign she is not into that and you need to respect that.
Buy a whip and leave it in the house, just in case. If it is there ready, it might be used!
You may have to gently introduce this fetish to your partner so you do not scare her off. She may get into it straight away she may not so play it cool and slow.
Good luck
Angel of Love
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A
female
reader, balface +, writes (7 March 2007):
 I'm sure that if you sit down with her and talk to her about it then she will more than happily listen to what you have to say.I doubt you could loose what you have. Many women like to know that their partners are satisfied in the bedroom. I believe that at first she may seem a bit off on the idea, which I can see as understandable. I reckon eventually she will try out this fetish/fantasy you want and soon see that you enjoy it, thus making her want to do it more.Don't be so worried about what she might think, just go for it! I hope I've helped
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