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How can I stop looking at too much porn?

Tagged as: Pornography, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (7 March 2007) 24 Answers - (Newest, 27 August 2009)
A male United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Help, i look at porn and i am just 13. i need to stop because it is slowly eating away at me. I know god hates it. Any advice plz.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (27 August 2009):

Hey. I'm 14, and I used to watch porn when my mum went out. This was very easy cause it was just me + my 2 younger sisters.

What I do to stop watching is I do some homework go on the computer play games or something to distract me.

It does work, I'm telling you.

Just find something else that distracts you from watching porn.

Or download one of those things that block porn from your computer/laptop

Gl

x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2008):

it didnt come off as blunt it was clearly bullying and offensive tirade against an extremely vulnerable young male. adults should never ever behave like that towards children ever. it is almost child abuse in a different form. if adults have a bias it should not be shoved down kids throats to make our young ones feel bad about themselves about their natural feelings.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2008):

In today’s society, porn is viewed as something acceptable. The norm will think that all men get caught up in it, and have the “boys will be boys” attitude. A lot of people think that porn is a healthy habitual action to be mentally involved in. They think that it is normal to be curious, and what better way to solve that curiosity by innocently looking at porn. You will often here people saying, “Well as long as it keeps my boyfriend from cheating on me, I think its good!” and you will often hear men, as well as women saying that is increases the pleasure of sex life. So all in all, porn can be a positive thing, and isn’t hurting anything, so why the controversy?

I will tell you exactly when there is a controversy. The first problem is that a lot of people view this as something that boys will do, and it’s no big deal. By saying this, people are saying that porn is a natural thing to do, which makes it ok. I couldn’t be opposed to this any more than I am now. Porn is not a natural thing to do. It may be a natural feeling to want to look at it, but just because you have that feeling it doesn’t mean one should act upon it. The whole curiosity mumbo jumbo is a bull excuse to make porn seem ok to look at. We are all curious about things, but does that mean it is ok to do whatever it takes to satisfy that curiosity? I think not. A person may be curious about how it would be to rape women, or a man for that matter, but does it make it out to go do it just because you have that curiosity? Any person with any moral principals would have to say “no”. You may think the analogy that I just used is totally different from viewing porn, but in reality it has a lot of similarities. Have you ever heard of the term “Eye rape”? That is a term a lot of women use when they see a guy checking them out. Now, unfortunately, women in porn do this willingly, so in that sense it is not like rape. But what if some of them women in the porno regret their decision to be in porn? What if some of the women accepted Jesus into their heart; and realized that it is important to show men that they are beautiful on the inside; and not degrade themselves by showing men their parts? This means we would be looking at women in ways that she does not want. Does this seem fair? No it does not. This means women are being mentally raped.

Porn is a sad thing to fall into, and one of the sad things is that porn degrades women. Who, when looking at porn, thinks “Wow, I bet she is a really nice person”, or “wow, she has pretty eyes”. No one! Since when did a body become more important than the actual person? Sadly, it’s been that way for a while now. You may think, “oh well I don’t know the person, so it’s ok!” This is totally irrational to think. Whether you know the person or not, you aren’t looking at them as a person, you are looking at them as a object, which is terrible to do to anyone. Even people who are in porn are humans, and they deserve to be treated as such, even if they don’t treat themselves as such.

Porn isn’t just wrong to the women in the porn, but is wrong because it can hurt your future wife/husband, and girlfriend/boyfriend. A lot of people lie to their significant other about watching porn, which is hurtful in the first place. It is sad that in today’s society getting off to a naked person is considered okay, especially to those in relationships. Porn is a form of cheating. Even if you view porn together, you are still looking at a naked women/man while getting sexual excited. At this rate, going out and giving oral sex to a person will not be considered cheating. This needs to stop before it gets any worse.

It is so easy to get addicted to porn, which is another reason why it is bad to look at it, even it if it is only one time. If you start watching porn, you have the potential to get addicted, which means you have the potential to never fully be able to stop, which means that it also has the potential to ruin future relationships whether your other agrees with it or not. What a lot of people don’t recognize is that the images from porn can stay with a person forever. Do you really want your future husband or wife to have images of other people having sex while you are having sex? If you answer yes to this question, maybe you need to evaluate your relationship or future relationships. These images take away your mental virginity.

If none of this has convinced you that porn is wrong, think of this scenario. Your current/ future daughter or son decides the he or she wants so extra cash, so picks up the job of being in porn videos, pictures, ect. How do you react? And how do you react to the people that sit around and watch your daughter/son having sex? Do you like that people don’t realize that she or he is so much more than a body? Just because we don’t know these people personally, doesn’t mean that they are not someone’s sister, brother, daughter, son, cousin, grandson, boyfriend/husband, and if we think it is okay because we don’t know them, that means we are being selfish and hypocritical if you agreed with the above statement about your daughter/son being in porn.

There are so many reasons why porn is bad, but the last reason I will touch on is that it doesn’t help men or women who are trying to be pure and don’t want to object women and men the way so many people do. Out of respect for them, dress conservatively and make it easier for them to not see you as a object. Even if you do not believe in God you should respect the fact that people are trying to grown strong for something they believe in. So for those who get enjoyment out of showing off their bodies, and showing men and women them having sex, think about other people than yourselves. Sex is something so special, and when you have something special you want to share it with someone that is important to you. If you share it with anyone that wants it, it doesn’t become so special anymore because it becomes something for everyone to see and something that is common.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2008):

hey man, i understand your problem. Im 15, and i recently started looking. I knew inside it was wrong, but tried to convince myself that breast and stuff were just body parts, like arms and legs, and tried to convince myself it wasn't bad. but I knew it was and felt very guilty. It was hard to go on the computer without looking. I felt so bad, but it was so nice while i was looking. I used to tell people I'd never looked at porn before, and none of my friends believed me. Just tell yourself that you'd rather please God than yourself and fight through it. I know it's hard but keep fighting.

P.s. God DOESN'T hate you.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2008):

I had the same problem. Just try to keep your mind off of porn. Instead of going on the computer where you are temped to go on porn sites go outside or do homework or exercise or anything other then going on the computer. Unless you have to do something for school on the computer, you could go to library where you probably won't want to look at porn there with people everywhere around you. These are some ways to get over your problem.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2008):

ngek Im trying too maybe just try to close your eyes while watching a porn so youll find your self it is crazy doing all this things and its a sin actually that is why I wanted to stop too

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2008):

Here's a little advice. When ever your bored, never ever sit in front of a computer. Go and hang out outside, even if your alone. Go take a walk with the Lord. If you need to use the computer, then you should make a small list in your head on what it is your going to do. Make sure the sites you visit are safe from advertisments and porno.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2008):

Im 14 and i have been looking at porn and i always say to my self i wouldnt look at it...... and the next day i spend the day thinking and after that i just look all over again,......

Sometimesi think nothing could help me with this addiction, but i figured from reading all your wonderful posts and said to my self.... im not the only one and i can stop looking at porn and also i have been praying about this addiction since i've been 12 so i will keep on trying

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2008):

i am 13 years old too.. i used to look at porn all the time..and i used to promise myself i wouldnt and i still. ential i found this page that made me feel good. if you read about 4 cheapers and pray to God you will get through it. i still have thoughts about sex and i still somethings go and look at porn but im still going long peroidsof times with out looking

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A male reader, AmazingGrace1979 United States +, writes (18 January 2008):

Oh my,my,my. I am 28 and I have struggled with Porn for a long time. The best way for me to not look at this mind degrading junk is to pray, stay away from the internet, and to tell older Church males who can hold me accountable. Wow! This is a huge problem you guys. The porn industry didn't start in this century either. I believe that there are many stories in the Bible and also books written by others about porn. It's not going anywhere, because it's an industry fed by poor weak souls who give into the fleshly desires fueled by the enemy.

We can do something together by staying accountable. We can start a cyber group where we can chat about our daily or weekly encounters with this problem. If we stick together like brothers and sisters we can defeat the enemy and this huge problem. come on everyone, we are human and we struggle all the time whether it is porn or looking and glancing at another person in a sexual manner. Humans are interesting, we all like to analyze others, don't deny it. Everyone looks at others and they make an opinion about them, good or bad.

Let us pull together and be accountable, but be grown op about it, do not be disrespectful or degrading. If anyone needs to talk, you can reach me at [email address blocked]. I would love to talk to anyone in need of encouragement.

Until then GOD bless everyone.

JB

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (8 January 2008):

actually.. Just a reply to some people.. God is not a man nor women! but we need to think of him as a man with female features..some people think its easy to stop looking at porn.. But be honest to yourself do you want to stop? people know its bad and want to stop but they "don't" at the same time so they "don't".. and im sure you know that it could effect your future relationships thoughts and you may already be addicted and im sure you've heard this a million times of what better you could be doing in life.. But face it there will always be time your home alone or someone is a way .. its not the time or where you look at it.. It always Always! starts off with just alittle look every now and then.. but if your not addicted do not get addicted because if you find it hard to stop it will feel almost impossible soon for you.. and if you are addicted I suggest you pray everytime you think about it or your about to look at it pray for forgivness as god to help you stop.. restrict you self to what you do and its best if you dont keep it a secret as hard as it may be.. ask a parent now of course they may not be quite as understanding as you planned but getting it out and knowing you have God and a parent helping you with your problem will help you get through.. Best Wishes

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2007):

when I was your age I looked at porn everyday and I couldn't stop. So what I did was I just thought to myself this Is is taking over me so I asked God to help me.

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A male reader, Anonymous5638 United States +, writes (2 November 2007):

I know it's hard to get over the habit of watching porn, but you have to have faith in god and jesus. You need to confess your sins to him ask for forgiveness. And I know it will be hard for you to cope with saying "God forgive me and then going back to watchin women degrade themselves or, porn." But anyways I myself used to watch just a small amount of porn and I was being exposed to it by younger cousin, and at first I would get on to him about and then I was curious and I found myself watching it, and so I was being a hypocrite about the situation. But right now I am asking god and confessing to him about my situation, because I don't want to destroy my future sex life and disappoint my parents. So I hope you can stop watching before you become addicted to it. Instead of watching porn just read your bible and take your mind of sex and lusting after women, and that's what I'm doing now, because I do want to be a truly saved and have a healthy relationship with my wife, whenever that happens. Keep your head up and look towards god.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2007):

I know it's hard to get over the habit of watching porn, but you have to have faith in god and jesus. You need to confess your sins to him ask for forgiveness. And I know it will be hard for you to cope with saying "God forgive me and then going back to watchin women degrade themselves or, porn." But anyways I myself used to watch just a small amount of porn and I was being exposed to it by younger cousin, and at first I would get on to him about and then I was curious and I found myself watching it, and so I was being a hypocrite about the situation. But right now I am asking god and confessing to him about my situation, because I don't want to destroy my future sex life and disappoint my parents. So I hope you can stop watching before you become addicted to it. Instead of watching porn just read your bible and take your mind of sex and lusting after women, and that's what I'm doing now, because I do want to be a truly saved and have a healthy relationship with my wife, whenever that happens. Keep your head up and look towards god.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2007):

I have been thinking about the same question myself.

Although it is not a regular basis that I view such material: I too would like to STOP!

The way to look at is that is a relationship between you and what you view.

It takes two to have a relationship , if you start to view less and less then it will come to a CLOSE and a relationship will no longer exists.

I have found that also , weight training is also another help to relase those tensions.

The LINK to avoid on the Internet is FREE why FREE because they are more desperate then us for a relationship to exist so that it plays on our needs.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2007):

I'm 19 and I live alone so there is nobody to tell me not to look at porn but I know it's wrong. I definitely feel convicted about it and it doesn't have to be in the bible to know it's wrong. When you know Jesus you will know when what you're doing is wrong and I too am struggling with this. It's just so easy to fall back into it when there is nothing to stop me but I am trying. I think I need to tell someone that will keep me accountable so it's not only me that knows im struggling.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2007):

You can stop looking at too much porn by keeping your mind off of it or anything that will get you thinking about it. I looked at porn for two whole years, and i am only thirteen. I stopped when i thought about how my parents trusted me not to look at it. Also, the Lord my God told me that it could influence me into doing something i would regret all my life. You should also play games only on game systems like the Xbox, PS2,Gamecube,etc., or go outside and play when you get a urge to look at porn. That way you are isolating yourself from the source of porn, the internet. Another good way to keep yourself or kids from looking at porn is to spend some good-ol' fashion family fun outside. This way you are having and are also keeping your mind off of porn. But the way i stopped was just not to look at girl's boobs or buttios unless i could handle not thinking about what they looked naked. If you do start to think about nude women, your mind will become tangled up in the devil's net of deception and death. Pornography leads to nowhere but abusement,harrassment, and lying. If you are a married man, tell your wife about your problem with pornography. She can probably offer you some very helpful advice on how to stop. Pornography can lead to stress because the viewer becomes worried that their parents or wife will find out, but is so tangled up in pornography that they think a little more porn won't hurt them. If you are a child, then tell your parents about your problem. Your parents may have fought with the same problem when they were your age. Avoid looking at movies with nudity unless you can handle. Nudity in movies may encourage the viewer to view porn online. If you are not saved and have not acepted our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, as yor savior, then do so, and the Lord will help you stop looking at pornography in all it's various forms, and you will be free from the threat of Hell's flames and will be in the safety of the arms of Jesus.

Doing one of those things will ensure that you don't start to look at porn, then get off of the computer feeling so horrible,miserable, and ashamed of yourself that you want to commit suicide. It is not your fault that you cannot stop looking at pornography, because the flesh wants you to think that. You cannot win the battle against pornography by yourself, you WILL need help from the almighty Lord our God. Our God is loving,caring and forgiving, but if you do not ask Him for help, His hands are tied behind His back until you ask for forgiveness.

Good Luck trying to free yourself from pornography, because you will face challenges.But never forget that the Lord Our God is willing to help and forgive you. Remember that the Devil is a liar.

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A female reader, aunty t Ireland +, writes (8 March 2007):

aunty t agony auntThis is very healthy at your age to watch porn and be curious about sex. But it is worrying you and is obviously becoming a problem. Alot of people become addicted to porn and then there is a problem. Dont let it take over your life. You have nothing to be ashamed of and you are only one of millions of other lads around your age who are doing exactly the same. There is nothing wrong with you but do keep it under control and stop feeling guilty.

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A male reader, maxsteel86 United Kingdom +, writes (8 March 2007):

maxsteel86 agony auntPorn a good way to explore your sexual etc? Please!! Fisting? Come on ladies (or gents), how many of you out there regularly perform that? Thats the sort of extreme crap porn is all about these days, totally degrading to women and pretty disgusting too (you can bet those women will have one easy job giving birth!) stay away from porn sites. You can get your ISP to block them if you really wanted to stop watching that. Go ahead and get some filters installed to block it.

To the anon poster, God is above that crap!

AngelofLove, just cos there are worse sins makes the less bad ones ok? How do you feel about the sins of murder and rape then? Technically rape and murder is worse than just plain rape. So rape is ok now?

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A female reader, chachacha United Kingdom +, writes (7 March 2007):

If you feel it is "eating away at you" then it is a problem.

Is it because you are spending too much time looking at it, when you should be doing homework or being with friends? If so, you are probably addicted to it. Addictions are often easier to cure if you just STOP, rather than trying to limit how long you look at it for, because it's always easy to have "just another 10 minutes".

Is it because you think it is wrong?

You don't know that god hates it. You don't know that god exists and even if he does, you don't know that he doesn't like you looking at porn. It doesn't say in the bible, thou shalt not look at porn. And anyway, people ignore a very large part of what is in the bible, a lot of which contradicts itself or doesn't make sense. So, try not to worry about god too much on this point.

A lot of men and some women look at porn, and they do so for all sorts of reasons. You shouldn't spend your time feeling really guilty for this.

However, there are some concerns - most porn tends to objectify women in an unpleasant way and if you look at it too much, you might not end up having the kind of constructive equal relationships with women that healthy people have.

But if you take it all with a pinch of salt and have a bit of a laugh at it, and just don't do it too often or for too long, you'll probably be okay.

Finally, if you get out and make some friends and perhaps get yourself a girlfriend, you'll be too busy to be wasting your life looking at porn - the real, clothed thing, smiling and laughing with you is much more fun, trust me.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2007):

I disagree with the first aunt, I think porn is a horrible way to explore one's sexual desire, especially for a 13 year old...this is not a true picture of what relationships are supposed to be like among loving consenting adults, and is not even a good education on how to have sex, as it is very unrealistic!

Don't beat yourself up for being curious, but this can lead you to no good and you may even get addicted to it...one way to stop looking at it is to close your eyes to it, why don't you have a filter on your computer that blocks these sites.....tell your parents that you are accessing sites that are inappropriate for someone your age, that they just keep popping up during web searches, and see if they can't help you put a block on accessing these kinds of sites.....show a little restraint and remove the temptation from your computer.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2007):

hunni, who eva told u god hates it is lying hes a man too! im sure he did it in his time! its normal for anyone to masterbate! you are not doing anything wrong!

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A male reader, Kody  Ireland +, writes (7 March 2007):

Hey man

I am 15 and I look at porn somtimes its ok just as long as you dont do something your parents would get mad at .We teens are very curious and its ok

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A female reader, AngelofLove United Kingdom +, writes (7 March 2007):

AngelofLove agony auntDo not be to hard on yourself.

You are at a very young age where curiosity about sex is very high. But even mature men love watching porn.

There are worst sins. Remember that as long as you are not hurting anyone or contributing to any violent situation, it is very healthy to explore one's sexual desire.

Nothing to feel guilty about.

Angel of Love

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