A
male
age
36-40,
*uaris
writes:Me and my gf had been going out foe 5 months before we broke up one week ago. We were each other's first make out partner all the way to oral sex in this time. All of the people in school said we were a beautiful couple and we were perfect for each other. Some teachers even told me this! Even so we had been arguing a lot for the month leading up to the break but we still had very good times with each other. However one night after getting into an argument over sex we had a mutual break-up. The argument was actually becuz earlier that night I asked if we could go all the way to which she said no which I was absolutely okay with. It was only until later in the night when I was taking her home and she told me she wished we WOULD have fooled around did I start an argument. I never thot we would break up its just me and her are virgins and she had told me b4 she wanted to lose her's to me and I wanted mine to be for her so when it didnt work out I temporarily got mad. Well Ive written her two different times asking her to forgive me multiple times and Im currently going to see a psychologist about some depression issues as well next week. Even thru all this pleading and extreme attempt at change she will not talk to me at school when only a week ago we were INSEPARABLE. The only contact we have is when she pokes or pushes me playfully in the hall but shes just a nice person like that and probably only does it to keep me from feeling too bad after my heartfelt apology letters. I really need her back shes the greatest thing that has ever happened to me and if that means we will have to abstain from sex for the next 20 years I am willing to because she is the most amazing human being I have ever met and it is not only me but everyone else who knows us and our personalities and backgrounds that see this fact too. I really need help. How do I at least start being her freind again. I mean, if I cant be the romantic guy in her life I still care enough to help her through any bad times in her life, even as just a friend because I will do anything to keep this girl as happy as I can, however I can.
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male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (19 January 2009):
 If you want to be your friend and not her lover. then you need to give it some time and space. But speak to her about this, say to her you want to still be friends and mean it, then agree to meet up in six months time and it should be fine. However i find this hard if your at the same school. B eprepared to possibly see her with someone else if this happens.
If you want to be her lover, in this instance, continue to chase her in moderation but don't over do it. tell her how you feel. though, im sure you already have.
If you ever argue with her again just bite your tounge and don't say anything especially during sex or foreplay.
A
female
reader, PunkyPippi +, writes (19 January 2009):
 Maybe your relationship just ran its natural course. What were you arguing about prior to breaking up?
Also, I don't think it's a good idea for you to try to be her friend right now because you're too infatuated with her. If she honestly doesn't want you back, you can't make her, and being around her right away is only going to confuse you and make you feel worse.
Have a long chat with her, make sure that she doesn't want to be together, and if not, let it go for a few months.
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A
female
reader, UnfinishedSymphony  +, writes (19 January 2009):
 what you waiting for??
go get her back tiger.
don't do what i did and loose those you love to a petty petty argument over absolutely nothing.
thats the worst of it, not knowing what may of happened if that night hadnt happened
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