A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my partner have been together for 1 year. We started off as best friends before we became official, so we are like soul mates as they all say. we were very much in love, we had a unique bond and very different to other couples. when we fell in love, we both changed each others lives. he gave me everything ive never had, love and support (as ive lived a troubled life) and he came from a wealthy family with a happy life. anyway, we have just finished school and in his life, he wants to be an actor. acting is his dream. in january, he got offered to go to hollywood for 3 weeks and he warned me that it could be three months. i was ok with that, i supported everything in fact i pushed him to go but he didnt want to and i dont understand why. so he went.. we only talk on facebook. in the 3 weeks, he mailed me saying hes staying for 3 months. so far, its been two months. but last week, he mails me saying hes moving there for 2 years and wont see me until then so we ended our relationship. he was crying. i was angry. the last thing he said to me at the airport was 'i would never leave you, i promise' and i promised him id stand by every decision he makes cause if i loved him then i would. its really hard now, we hardly talk. as i said before, he changed my life. he gave me everything and now that hes gone he took that all away from me and i feel like hes selfish. cause when we talk on facebook, he tells me how much he loves it there and lifes great. i sit there crying cause he ruined my life. in front of my friends last year, he told me he would leave me for all the money in the world. its confusing cause this is his dream. but then if he really loved me he wouldnt leave? i feel that hes selfish cause hes only being happy for his life and jus left me here when i was the one who was there for him in the first place. i want a guys opinion, what would a guy do if you were in his positon? i feel stupid that i still talk to him now, after hes left me and now im diagnosed with depression beacause im that empty without him. im nothing. but its only because i love him and i promised id stand by him. i cry everynight cause i cant believe he left me. i cant believe hes so happy and im not, how can he feel like that? am i stupid for still talking to him? i will always be angry at him but i dont know how to express it without making out that its either me or his dream? i just think he shouldnt have left something he started especially when he changed my life. its like a big slap in the face.
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best friend, facebook, fell in love, money, soul mates, soulmate Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks guys. lately ive been thinking to just stop talking to him & move on cause even i know thats true, if he really loved me he would make a sacrifice. i know id do it for my loved one. the difference between us in our relationship is that he comes from a family where they are business people & all about money. i come from a family where we dont have ALOT of money but we'r so giving & know how to be happy. its all about family. i see thats why hes like that & im like this. if he really loved me he would stay, i dont want to sound selfish but i guess its true. especially when he made a big change to my life then took it all away from me, thats cruel & that hurts. now thats something i wouldnt do to someone 'for all the money in the world'
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (16 March 2010):
Everyone has a dream. And we all have to try to follow that dream. But to have someone waiting behind for when it goes wrong is cruel. He isn't selfish to want to follow his dream, but he is selfish for expecting you to wait around, or not at least offer you the chance to come out with him. Given that he didn't do that, he can't really love you. Better to move on now.
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A
male
reader, Kenj +, writes (16 March 2010):
 Although I can understand his reasons for wanting to move there and better his own life, he cant truly love you.
If he truly loved you, he would have come home and at least discussed this with you first which would have at least give you the oppertunity to join him if you wanted to.
In a true love relationship, one partner is at least willing to sacrifise their plans to make the other happy.
If he hasnt been back in contact within a month then move on and find someone else who appreciates you.
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