A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I asked my husband for a divorce and he started spewing out a bunch biblical stuff at me, telling me God was going to punish me and my whole life will be cursed after this. He really freaked me out. I don't want to anger God by filing for divorce but I am not happy and I don't want to be in this relationship anymore. What should I do?
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female
reader, tj no 1 +, writes (2 August 2009):
DO NOT allow yourself to be emotionally blackmailed by a bully who is trying his level best to undermine your confidence and self-esteem. Instead of focusing on the bible, why isn't he talking to YOU? You want to be loved, cherished and valued. Sadly THIS relationship is NOT WORKING. Walk away and be happy - do you want another 10/20 yrs of misery?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2007): There is on way that Heavenly Father would condone abuse. NONE.
If your husband does not want to work to change his abusive ways; staying won't help him or you. Staying enable him and in an abuser's mind; gives him permission to keep treating you the way he wants.
I am an advocate of the Family and Marriage and if a person is married to an abusive spouse and has endured it for years and has reached their limits; I will not tell them to stay.
Counselling and instruction from your local Church leader is a good way to go but do know that not all Beliefs support that abuse is not in God's plan for Eternal happiness. So do be careful.
In the end, you get to decide-you get to choose and you know yourself better than I do or anyone else on this site.
I wish you the best.
*hugs*
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2007): wy would you wont to leave him God know what to do with him if he is missing around that one thing but if he is doing what know to do that is right then why leave but if it something else thing wait on God ask him what to do go down onyour knee and pray and be rea whenyou pray youwill see what will do for pray about the promble and make sure that you are not the promble for God know everthing do the right thing
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A
male
reader, SumYungGuy  +, writes (5 August 2007):
 I had to chime in one more time on this one...
Be very careful of the advice given here regarding God. I agree with only a few things said here, but Dr. Pete made one suggestion I absolutely agree with
"..if you are a religious or chuch-attending person then you should speak to a leader there about what God would think about all this."
Absolutely!! Seek guidance from someone who KNOWS the bible and how to interpret its text. I fear that some people (including myself) have a 'knowledge' about God but believe what we think God wants for us - based on our human emotions. YES - God wants you to be happy - but be careful about how you go about achieving happiness. And God may not punish, but God certainly allows us to be tested. Read the the Book of Job. Job was a true believer of God and did wonderful things to please God, but God allowed Job to be tested to show that even through strife and misery, he would still praise God and not curse him.
Be VERY careful on this subject. Do as Dr. Pete suggested - seek a minister or pastor or whatever to really get a grasp on what the BIBLE says and not what WE say.
Hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, YummyMummy +, writes (4 August 2007):
 I am sure if you are that unhappy then God wont be angry with you at all. It seems to me your husband has only said that to stop you leaving him.
I would sit down and talk to him and tell him you aren't happy and you still want a divorce. God may not like divorces but I am sure he would rather see you happy then unhappy!
xxxxxxxxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2007): That's crap. That is just a controlling tatic. God values free agency and has a more understanding and forgiving heart than what your husband is feeding you.
Happiness is what he desires most for us.
If husband is controlling and abusive-he sounds like it, leave. There is no way Heavenly Father would support such a union. Men are to honor, love, respect his Heavenly Daughters, which you are.
It's your choice. Just be careful of your husband's anger, have family memeber present and police involved if necessary. Controlling men are often possessive and may go into an unhealthy rage.
Seek a counsellor's advice as he/she will know how best to help you.
Best Wishes.
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A
female
reader, x_goddess_x +, writes (4 August 2007):
 god will not be angry because he would feel angry if you stayed in a marrige wich you did not like and you was unhappy god would love it if you was happy and found someone tht does make you happy
ur husband i just tryin to make you stay in the marriage but you have to do wat is best for you and god will go with tht
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A
female
reader, BEEN THERE DONE IT +, writes (4 August 2007):
 Hi there babes,
God forgives he doesn't punish the good........
If you are unhappy with your marriage babes then God himself would not like to see you in this pain would he????
If you have tried everything and nothing has worked then speak to God tell him how you are feeling your heart will lead you in the right direction, but no one has to live a life of misery and unhappiness he will forgive you no matter what religion you are God loves and forgives us all if we ask him xxxx
Good luck darling
Love Donna
xx
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A
female
reader, dollparts  +, writes (4 August 2007):
 I think God would want you to be happy but like the others said you should go see your local minister or something, your husband controling and like the others said as well don't take notice of him, you do what you please and if your happy I think God will be happy him self:)
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A
male
reader, Jamer70 +, writes (4 August 2007):
 I agree with Dr Pete on this one.
Your (EX)-husband is saying this biblical stuff to keep you in the marriage by scaring you with gods wrath.
Im assuming you are a higly religous person so i would talk to your local leader and have his take on your unhappy marriage.
I bet no-one will want to keep you in this marriage and i also believe that you proberly thought this over for a while and isnt a gut call, i doubt god will want the punish you for wanting a happier life.
But if your still torn talk to your leader
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2007): Your (to be ex)husband has nothing to do with your relationship with God.
If you are a religious or chuch-attending person then you should speak to a leader there about what God would think about all this.
If I were you, I wouldn't take what your husband says too seriously as he is obviously hurt and is using that kind of language to try and keep you.
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A
male
reader, SumYungGuy +, writes (4 August 2007):
Hmm. Went through the same thing myself recently - my wife wanting to leave me and me not wanting God to be angry at ME.Matthew 5:32 and 19:9 states very clearly when divorce is acceptable.."whosoever shall put away his wife (or husband) except it be for fornication and shall marry another committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her (or him) which is put away doth commit adultery."So basically, unless your husband is cheating on your, or you on him, divorce is not acceptable. However, you do have a saving grace - which was mine.You need to pray. I mean REALLY pray (if you're a Christian and believe that Jesus is your Lord and Saviour). You need to pray for guidance in this situation. Ask him to step in and work through the problem(s) in your place. The problem that we Christians often have are problems that we create by NOT listening to the Word and taking heed his message. God wants us to rely on him and him only. He doesn't want us to try to work through the problem because when we do we do it messily. Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding." Trust that the Lord will do what you ask him to do - and allow him to do it. Don't do what you THINK you should do.Once you pray for God to step in and you stop worrying about the problems your marriage is facing, you will see wonders begin to work through your marriage. And IF GOD doesn't want you to be married to this man anymore, allow God to make that happen but you shouldn't come to that conclusion by yourself. God will speak to you and show you your path if you allow him to direct your paths - and if your path is to stay together - then you need to follow God's direction. It's when we DO NOT follow God's direction that God gets angry with us.Hope this helps. Pray.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2007): Fearing God. Yes, and a Danish philosopher broke his engagement for almost the same reason - his father told him the family was punished by God for his juvenile mistakes and he didn't want to extend this disgrace to his fiance so he remained lonely his whole life. So many unadequate" " acts to please" " God. Contradiction! If God is so kind he won't punish anyone who only desires a better life. You are sure you don't belong with your husband and the marriage can't be saved? You are sure you want a change? Is everything irremediable? Act upon it then... We make God angry when we intentionally break others' safety, when we exploit or manipulate people etc etc...
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