A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey there. There is this girl that has been constantly texting my boyfriend and I recently found out that she has been going over to his house by reading his text messages. I know that it's bad and all but he never tells me who it is. In the texts and even facebook messages they're always asking each other for cuddles and things like that. Whenever we go out as a group she always hugs him and hangs off him and the last time we went out, he stopped hugging me and walked over to her and started hugging her from behind. They go out together quite a lot, mostly as a group but I'm never invited and he doesn't tell me about these things either. I know I may sound like a jealous girlfriend or whatever but I guess I am. Should I tell him about my worries or just keep my trust in him that nothing will happen between the two of them?? please help!
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all so much for your feedback. I plan on talking to him about it when i next see him... hopefully all goes well.
A
male
reader, addz +, writes (10 April 2011):
meh say something to him. If he gives you crap go how would you like me hanging off a another guy ?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2011): If he was just a friend it would be ok for him to behave like that. But being your boyfriend means how hes behaving isnt ok. If my partner met up with someone behind my back, even in a group. Entertained her in his home but didnt tell me. Was constantly texting her and not telling me, trading affectionate remarks about things like cuddling. Then dropped me to go and cuddle her...from behind too, which is an uber intimate way to approach someone. Well then, i would be very worried, let alone jealous! Your feelings are perfectly understandable. I think you should talk to him and ask whats going on because he has more than a passing interest in her.You could mention seeing him hug her in a very intimate way has bothered you. Ask if he has much phone contact with her or sees her away from the group. If he tells you they text a lot and she visits his place, at least hes being honest. But if he says they dont have very much contact and he doesnt see her alone. Then you will know hes lying and you will be able to make an informed decision as to whether you want to continue with him or not.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2011): there is no way i would lt my boyfriend do this! and im not the jealous type... you need to have a serious talk to him
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A
female
reader, sneha09  +, writes (10 April 2011):
 I have to admit that you have so much of patience,if it was mine i would have stopped seeing him without any explanation after he start hugging that very girl in front of me with whom he had been talking in this way and visiting him.The talking part may be little flirty but this hugging part and visiting house I could have never accepted.Confront him,ask him where they stand?what he is thinking?If he is avoiding this, you too avoid him but keep an eye on.I think this will be enough and if he continues, don't waste time just move on.
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