A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I met a guy 2 weeks ago, who I hit it off with really well. We met at a bar near my school and hung out the whole night. He had said he was surprised that I even spoke to him, and that he normally never went up to girls as he found most girls at bars not his type. He mentioned to me that he really wasn't interested in a one-night hook up and is looking for a relationship as he is a few years (5) older than me. We ended up back at my apartment where we literally just slept together, just kissing, nothing else. We got breakfast the next morning and then for the whole week after we texted several times throughout the day. Even about the dumbest things (with both of us initiating equally). This past weekend was my friend's birthday so I couldn't go out with him but I met up with him separately (he even had the cab he was in come from the opposite side of the city to get me from where I was as I wasn't having any luck getting to where he was). Again we had a sleep over with some kissing, and he kept saying that he didn't want to rush anything and that we had time before we did more. He also said that after the holiday we would go on a real date. Then when he went home the next morning he hasn't texted nearly as much. I texted him Monday night asking how his day was and he just sent a few words back- that same old, just work. I didn't hear from him in 2 days and texted him this afternoon with a funny story but again he's been slow to respond. I'm very confused by his behavior. To go from frequent texting last week and acting as though he was interested in me...I don't think I'm coming off as needy as I'm not texting him about my feelings or demanding his attention. Is he no longer interested in me? Any advice would be appreciated!
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male
reader, alternaterealities +, writes (25 November 2010):
 It's funny how this happens, and it happens to everyone. And then one day you realize you are on the opposite end of it for whatever reason.
It's hard to answer because so little is known about him. Does he have any baggage he's carrying around? Recent break ups?
The best thing you can do is play dead and see what he does. Don't stress over it. If he texts, don't rush back to answer him. If he does ask you out again don't say yes, say "what did you have him mind?" "hmm, the could be fun." but still not a yes. See if he bites. In the mean time, don't forget there's lots of other fish swimming in that swamp of men.
And while he could be preoccupied, it's not hard to respond to someone or at least say hello. A real man would actually dial and call anyway.
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (25 November 2010):
 He sounds like a wimp. One night stands are not everybody's cup of tea but for him to actually say that out loud makes him unconfident as a man. It's like a coverup for his insecurity in the bedroom department. He's one who would complain a good woman is hard to find, but when the opportunity presents itself he's scared. Him saying girls at bar is not his type is some guy talk. It was really insensitive for him to tell you that. I guess his intention was to let you know that he has high standards but he came off sounding like an ass, to me. He's just saying stuff without much depth. Don't waste time thinking about him. That holiday may or may not come. The only thing you are after is why he hasn't responded. If you knew him better he wouldn't be that interesting after all.
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A
female
reader, SmilySmily  +, writes (24 November 2010):
Well guys are sometimes strange like that. He mite have found someone else or something might have happend that he isnt interested in you anymore.. or He could be just really busy and doesn't really have time to txt you.. But you gotta wait for him to txt you first next time. Guys don't really like a girl txting him all the time whether it was clingy or not. they just love to chase i think. So give him sometime and see and if he's not getting back to you. You're better off moving on than thinking of him!!! Hope he will get back to you tho since you sound like you're having a good fun with him..!! Good luck ;) x
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