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I thought he was my true love. But his actions since the breakup make me wonder. How has he been able to move on so soon after our breakup?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Dating, Faded love, The ex-factor, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 January 2011) 1 Answers - (Newest, 26 January 2011)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *elissa-Jade writes:

My ex is 27, 4 yrs older than me. We were together for 2 years, it felt like true love, he always hinted about the future together we had plans made.

We didn't see each other for 2 weeks, due to exams, and he barely texted me. Last week, exams over, he broke up with me due to the stress of uni, but said he still loved me. I told him people don't dump someone they love over uni work, and he said we we're too different, and that I make him lazy and not focus on uni.

I couldn't believe it, as we'd just been away at christmas together and everything was fine until during exam period, and he was still going on about buying me an Christmas present to replace the one he got me, but that we took back (didnt fit).

Anyway, we havent contacted or seen each other since. He rarely used facebook before but is now constantly updating his status, saying he's going out at night, trying to get people to go out to a club exactly the day we broke up a week ago.

He has also added many other girls at uni, plus has started commenting his ex of over 10 years ago.

And has changed his profile picture to him and a random girl he isn't even friends with anymore. He has also been private messaging some girls on facebook (i looked as i have his password but now feel awful) and said hi gorgeous to one in particular.......

Is he trying to get my attention? he knows i have his password and he hasn't changed it. He told me he needed to focus on uni, but now that University has started back he is always trying to go out with friends?

I do not plan on contacting him, as he ended things with me, and when he broke up with me I didn't put up a fight because I thought he looked tired, stressed out and was probably acting irrationally. I thought he'd be back soon regretting his decision, and just needed to get things under control.

I felt like he was the one, and he treated me like he felt the same. I feel like two years have just gone down the toilet.

View related questions: broke up, christmas, facebook, his ex, move on, period, text, university

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A female reader, maverick494 United States +, writes (26 January 2011):

If this happened to me I'd feel like crap too. I'd probably contact him and throw his own words back in his face. "Clubbing, hooking up with other girls. Nice euphemism for 'studying'. If this is your way of 'focusing on Uni' you'll never get a degree." (If you think the last sentence is too harsh you could replace it with a question "I thought you were supposed to focus on Uni?")

I would atleast want to get the truth out of him. If he's this carefree and chatting up his ex, something probably happened while you two were still dating. You don't just dump someone out of the blue unless something's going on.

Others will probably advise you to not even bother. Normally I'd advise the same. But this is such a unsatisfactory ending of a relationship, I'm making an exception.

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