A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:A co-worker and I really hit it off when we met. He kept calling me pretty and beautiful, he kept telling me the dates me wanted to take me on, he said I was an amazing girl and he couldn't get over how I could be single. He would call me and we talk for hours. We talked about everything. Then, suddenly, I started to hear from him less and less. He never took me on the dates he said he was going to. We were hooking up here and there, and when we were together it was fantastic. Now, he treats me like an acquaintance. A manager at our work was saying how the two of us have chemistry, and he laughed at it and said that was the stupidest thing he's ever heard. I was really hurt by this. He still invites me over to hang out and we still talk at work, but suddenly he doesn't tell me I'm beautiful, he doesn't call to talk anymore and he never mentions these dates he wanted to take me on. What's going on here? I'm so confused and hurt. I thought he really liked me and wanted to be with me. What happened?
View related questions:
at work, co-worker Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Intrigued3000 +, writes (5 October 2014):
 If you had sex with him then this is what he was after. He was trying to disguise his true intent with empty promises. Don't beat yourself up about having sex with him. If a man's goal is just to sleep with a woman, he'll lose interest if they sleep together after one date or 20 dates. Some men just like the thrill of the chase and when the chase is over they lose interest.
I would advise that you either set some boundaries with him or get rid of him. I don't think he is treating you very well.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (5 October 2014):
 When you say hooking up, do you mean sex?
If so, he got what he wanted from you, he is on to the next unsuspecting new female employee.
YOU listened to his word-vomit and you DID NOT pay any heed to his actions.
Words:
He SAID he thought you were the most amazeballs girl and he wanted to date you blah blah blah...
BUT..
Action:
HE never took you out on dates and after "hooking up" he started to treat you like an acquaintance...
The guy is a FIRST CLASS ASSHAT!
Block his number, ignore him at work (unless you have to work WITH him, then be polite and professional). And next guy that tries to woo you with words, but no actions.. don't be so fast to drop your knickers.
...............................
A
male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (5 October 2014):
Sadly he didn’t like you quite as much as you thought. If you had sex with him, he probably had got what he wanted and simply moved on. If you didn’t, he probably got bored waiting and has simply turned his attention elsewhere. I’m sorry to have to tell you this but I fear he charmed his way in to your affections and wasn’t actually interested in you at all for the longer term. Hold your head up, keep dignified, don’t call him or try to confront him about it. However difficult, simply act like you’re not bothered anymore either when around him. Pick yourself up and learn from this: talk is cheap and it’s actions that count. Make sure next time that the person backs their comments up with a time and venue for a date, and that they show up. Don’t rush in to the pattern of calling for hours and completely opening up straight away. Take your time, get to know them, and make sure they’re willing to wait for you and pursue you, because if they’re a chancer after one thing, they’ll soon slink off out of the picture when they realise they’re not getting it from you any time soon.
I wish you all the very best.
...............................
A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (5 October 2014):
Did you have sex with him?
...............................
A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (5 October 2014):
 Sounds to me like he finally realized he was being inappropriate and is embarassed.
...............................
|
