A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My husbands adult daughter can't seem to hold down a job she also has anxiety issues. I have been told she is selling nude pictures of herself online and I don't know what to do? I think she will deny it if I ask her and tell her father I am making trouble for her. How can I begin to bring this up and help her if this is the case?
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2019): The main thing that strikes me is "selling nude pictures."
I might be wrong, but I think almost nobody would pay for nude pics anymore.
I would ignore the rumors.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (16 January 2019):
 If my ADULT daughter was selling nudes of herself then yes, I would want to talk to her about it and WHY she would do that.
But as much as I would DISCOURAGE that kind of way to make money, there really wouldn't be ANYTHING I could do about it. Other than talk to her and try and understand what's really going on.
WHAT if this is her only source of income? What then? Should she be modest for your (and her father's) sake and starve?
You still didn't explain who told you... that is pretty telling to me. You know this for a FACT or as gossip, rumor?
If it's a rumor or gossip why not simply tell her that you heard this and is worried about her safety and well-being? She might deny it, she might NOT want to talk to you about it and then what?
As I mother, I would worry. I'm just not sure what it is you are hoping to accomplish here.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2019): I am original poster of question.It wasn't my intention to tell her father first,that was the headline dearcupid chose.I understand she is an adult and can do as she chooses I am worried for her and where this could lead to in her future and if I do ask her about it and then her father finds out I know he would be annoyed he was not told. Also I am surprised at you aunts because I am sure if this was your daughter you would want to know I sure as hell would!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2019): What will telling your husband do; but upset him?
She's a grown-woman, and she will have to deal with the consequences of her actions and decisions. If the nude-pictures are already out there; there's nothing anybody can do about it.
You can only feel sympathy for her. If she can't hold down a job, he already knows what she's capable of doing.
If he isn't financially-supporting her; he must have some idea how she's making money. If it got to you, it has made its way to him too! For all you know, she started the rumor to shame you both into giving her money.
Leave it alone!
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  +, writes (15 January 2019):
 If you honestly want to help this lady, the only way I can see which would not upset the apple cart is to speak with HER, not her father. You need to tread carefully though as what you heard MAY be true, but it may be ill informed or malicious.
Could you perhaps ask her general questions about how she is doing so that she might feel comfortable opening up to you? Wading in and saying "I hear you are selling nude pics of yourself" is, obviously, NOT the way to go.
The other aunts are right in that it is HER choice what she does to make money. If people want to pay her for nude pics, then she may see it as easy money. After all, they are only pics. I can, however, understand why you are concerned, especially given her frail mental health.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (15 January 2019):
 If it's true, that's fair enough. She's an adult and it's money. However, a job is fair game for *general*, PRIVATE discussion - so you can ASK her about it, out of curiosity, but not get your husband involved.As an adult, she can do what she wants. You can ask to talk with her about something someone has told you and ask her if it is true. Tell her you will not judge her or tell her father - and stick to that. Only offer help IF she asks for it. If she doesn't ask for it, then don't make a big deal out of her CHOICE.
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A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (15 January 2019):
 I have to agree with the other posters, this is none of your business. Unless she’s underage, she can earn money however she likes, some people make a comfortable living from this.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2019): Personally, I would just ignore the rumours, but if you are going to address the issue then I would do so with her directly and not with her dad. If she is selling pictures of herself then it is possible that she has concerns about money so perhaps speak with her about her financial issues, rather than the photographs, and see if there is anything you can do to help her in that respect. She is an adult, she knows what she’s doing.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (15 January 2019):
 OP, honestly why is what she doing your business? Its not like she's a young teen. She is old enough to make her own decisions good or bad and unless you can actually show proof you are only going to upset/offend your husband. Let me tell you when it comes right down to the wire 9 times out of 10 blood is thicker than water and you might wind up in a very uncomfortable situation with your husband. My advice? Stay out of it.
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (15 January 2019):
 Excuse me, but who is the source who told you she is selling pictures of herself? Im highly sceptical of this. She is an adult now, I say leave her alone.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (15 January 2019):
She is an adult. It's her body, her choice to sell pictures.
I have to ask WHO has told you she is doing this?
And what do you hope to accomplish by telling your husband about the pictures?
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