A
female
age
41-50,
*ngela83
writes:Hello 2 Everyone! Two days ago I discovered my fiancee still uses porn. It was so disgusting and frustrating for me, still he lies. The problem is that is impossible for him to ejaculate when we have sex, even though is always horny. He says he has stopped watching but I don't trust him, since the result is the same. My reaction has always been open minded and quiet because I understand that's a psychological problem and I don't want to harm him. On the other side I feel bad for myself. How should behave? Thanks!
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male
reader, MikeEa1  +, writes (24 November 2013):
 I have used porn on a regular basis a lot for years and find I can come straight away with some girlfriends and not at all with others and various in betweens. I also had a serious blow to the testicles in a motorcycle accident 6 years ago. I'm not convinced that porn is an addiction or that it is the reason a man can't do the business normally. I think the reality is that men like women have their ups and downs in these matters. Call off the heat as all men like to play the didgerie doo sometimes
A
female
reader, Angela83 +, writes (23 November 2013):
Angela83 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank u person 12345! Your suggestion was so useful. Its the 1st time i have this kind of problem and was a bit disoriented.
I think have to make a serious talk to my boyfriend, since plans to have babies with me.
Good night
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A
male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (23 November 2013):
 During my youth and much of my married life, porn was mostly unavailable - or difficult to find. Didn't need it. While married, it gradually became more available, and was occasionally, but rarely viewed. I think that it depends on frequency now that porn is almost everywhere. If frequent, then it is a problem and may never go away.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (23 November 2013):
 You have to realize porn is essentially a drug. You have recreational users and you have addicts. If he is an addict it is not possible for him to just, stop, easy as that. He needs to actually work at it, and get some help. For some people, just joining a community of other addicts is enough to break it, but for others professional help is needed. This site has a lot of really great information.
http://www.yourbrainonporn.com
I know it's easier said than done, but please please try not to take it personally. It is not a reflection on you any more than any other kind of drug use/addiction is. I know it's painful because it probably feels like he is turned off by you or you're bad in bed, but it's not you, it's a brain chemistry changed by a drug. I'm sure you are wonderful and he finds you gorgeous.
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