A
female
age
30-35,
*akel
writes:Im sleeping with a married man who has an 8 month old son and he lives next door to me. I think i have fallen in love with him and Im really close to his wife. I know its really stupid but i 14 years old. nd before anyone says hes taking advantage of me hes not its my choice but i think ive got into deep hole. please give me advice??
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female
reader, kelly hunter +, writes (15 August 2008):
 firstly it is illegal as u r only 14 n im gessin he is older but hes got a 8 month old son and i dnt think his wife wud b very happy if she found out my advice is to jst knock it on the head and end it wiv him after all he cn get into a lot ov trouble if anyone found out.x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2008): They call it 'Statutory Rape'. That's when an adult over the age of consent (16 in this case) has sex with a minor (that's you) and if your parents found out about it, and I hope they do, this guy gets hauled off to court and put on the sex offenders register. Which is what he deserves.
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A
female
reader, tammye17  +, writes (7 August 2008):
 i have been there 2..in ur shoes...but sweety this man is not going to leave his baby and his wife. honestly, his taking advanage of ur young age and his a selfish idiot for tdoing that, he knows what he is doing but u dont. think about it, ur goint to be in this for years until he gets bored of u or u end uo getting pregnant....ur 14, u are learning and u'll get over it, it will hurt, yes but you'll survive throught this, believe me, from experince.he will break ur heart. if u need anything just write 2 me...iam here.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2008): Hi Rakel,
I'm sorry you find yourself in this situation. This is not right, this man has been wicked to treat you and his wife like this. I know you fell in love, and I know that's why you found yourself in this situation. You need to be strong, you need to stop having sex with this man.
Don't answer his calls, if he turns up at your door, then go to your bedroom. Don't ever be alone with him again. Ignore him if he calls to you on the street. Your a teenager. Everyone expects teenagers to have funny moods and sometimes be downright rude. If anyone asks, he offended you, or you don't like him, or you think he's strange.... If he tries to get you on your own, if he touches you, talks to you or ever tries anything again. Tell him you talked to some people, tell him they know what he did. Threaten to tell his name and address to adults who care, threaten to tell his parents and his wife. This will be enough. He will be very scared and he won't come near you again.
If you need somebody to talk to, if you get sad and have nowhere else to turn, contact childline. They will understand, they will listen to your story, they won't tell anyone about what this man has done.
Childline is a UK charity that can provide support on the telephone for all kinds of problems that children and teenagers face, so please give them a call. ChildLine on 0800 1111. www.childline.org.uk
I'm sorry things have turned out this way. But you must be strong. Things can't continue, eventually his wife will find out, and that would be a big problem for you.
You can turn to your parents, you can tell them what happened. They will be very angry with this man. They will make sure he never comes near you again. They will make sure that he never tries to have sex with a child again. Don't be afraid. He is the adult, you are the child, he has a wife, he has a baby. He should never have had sex with you. This man is a pervert, he means you no good.
I know you think it's your choice and I know you think that you are partly to blame. But he's the adult, there are things that he has said and done to get you into bed. You have been very brave to come and tell us about this. Now I need you to be strong. I need you to call childline and tell them what happened, and I need you to tell this man to stay away or you will tell your parents and the police what he has done.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2008):
See how hard your are finding it to get yourself out of this "hole?"
Well, that's why people always say he's taking advantage of you.
Someone older and more experienced would have more likely had the judgment not to get themselves into this situation in the first place. And even if they did, they would still usually be a little better able to extract themselves from the situation once they realized they needed to leave it.
There's no easy answer now, except to walk away and get on with your life.
And you really do need to GET ON with your life. That's the important part. Just walking away isn't enough if you still sit at home on friday nights and think about him for the next year.
Please realize that this is bad for you, and endure the hurt of ending it RIGHT NOW. If you don't, all it will do is get harder and harder. You could ruin the rest of your teenage years waiting around for this guy to start giving you the relationship that he never will.
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A
female
reader, sappygirl +, writes (5 August 2008):
 I don't even know where to start.
Call the cops.. tell your parents...Run!
Listen and listen very carefully. This is a GROWN man...and he IS taking advantage of you.
He is saying and doing all the right things to make you fall in love with him. So he can get sex from you.
this an is a Child molester/predator and you need to end it NOW!!! You didn't state his age..but i'm assuming over 18 years old. You have to tell a trusted adult because as a teenager...you think you can handle certain situations but you are way in over your head.
I say stay away from the wife, the husband...go to your parents and together they will help you get through this. Goodluck
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A
female
reader, Dreamie Tofu +, writes (5 August 2008):
although it was your choice but did he ever tried to convince you or said something sexual to you? He can go to jail for having sexual contact with a 14 year old girl. Although i dont know the situation clear but he is married you say and he has a baby and a wife that you know well. Most likely he is just using you for sexual activities and when he is done or his wife finds out most likely he would say he never had any sexual contact with you or he didnt convince you,it was your choice. Although it was your choice but he should know better as a grown man not to mess with a youngster.Your still young..sorry for being harsh but i dont want you to end up like one of my friend.
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