A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey guys. I'm wondering if anyone here can relate and give me some advice. I'm 19 years old and I feel like I've sort of wasted my teenage years and that I didn't really live the life of a normal teenager. I've never had a boyfriend, never really had any close or best friends, never been to any parties, never really did anything on the weekends, etc. This is mainly because I've honestly always been overweight and shy. If I tried to make any friends, they would usually bail on me to go hang out with the more popular and attractive people. I was always called fat behind my back and was bullied at times. I mean who wanted to be seen with and friends with the awkward fat shy girl? Lol.I'm wondering if anyone has been in this type of position and how you've dealt with it. Where should I go from here?
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female
reader, Tenderlovingcare  +, writes (20 May 2013):
 I used to go to this club from the age of 10-16. I completely regret the way I was because I too feel like I wasted my teenage years for different reasons. I was constantly on the search for a boyfriend, and whenever someone liked me back, I would only be interested in them for a day and would end things with them. I feel like I wasted my whole teenage years constantly doing EVERYTHING just to impress guys and gain their attention. I hate the person I was and it makes me sad to think about it. I am now about to get married and our first child is due in 4 months. I like to think of it as just something that happened and isn't going to happen again. Although your teenage years are now over, you now have the more exciting moments ahead of you. You have the chance to meet mr right, and to start a family and make the friends that matter (the ones that aren't immature and they don't care about popularity etc). Enjoy your time now :D
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2013): I've been there... at 19 I too was shy and overweight with no friends, never having dated anyone. I promise, life gets better once you've been out of high school for a few years. Girls, at least the ones worth having as friends in your adult life, grow up and stop picking friends over trivial crap like who made the cheer squad and who's wearing the "right" clothes. You will gain confidence as you move from girlhood into womanhood, and that in itself will make you more attractive.If you're concerned your weight is holding you back, join a gym or try a team sport. This will not only tone your body and build your confidence but put you in contact with young men and women in your age group and provide you an opportunity for social interaction. For me it was rock climbing--first indoors, then outside as well. I got stronger and fitter, made new friends, and actually met the love of my life at a local climbing gym. But you can pick any activity that speaks to you and see similar benefits :) Best wishes!!xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2013): Youth is wasted on the young I'm afraid, enjoy whatever the time you have left you're only 19, you can still do all of those things you've mentioned, as long as you have your health and some money the world is your oyster
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 May 2013): I can totally relate to this! I'm 20 just now, and am currently making up for being a total prude in my teenage years :)
Then again, when you're a bit older you have more freedom to do as you please (particularly if you're like me and have flown the nest and have a good group of pals from uni). You'll also find others may have matured in their outlook, which is much more appealing than being a daft, superficial teenager.
I would say the key to making up for it is to go with the flow and see where you end up! Find a group of buddies (genuine people who like you for you :) ) and suggest doing things with them. who knows, the world's your oyster! Good luck, and have fun!!
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