A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I need your help agony aunts and for some advice as to what to do. I am friends with a female at work, we get on, have a lot in common and share the same interests, she's supported me when someone close in my family died and also when my heart was unfortunately broken.I would say she is my best friend, she's lovely, kind and has a friendly nature to her. She told me she was going away for a while on a trip abroad to do one of those crises appeals and while I'm happy she's achieving her dream in helping the disadvantaged. I feel something is wrong, ive not said anything to her on social media as ive checked this. When I spoke to her last week, she seemed to distance herself from me and by your body language I know or think something is up but she hasn't said what actually to me.Feel ive lost her and I'm worried while she is away for seven months with regards to the project. She will erase me from her life and wont talk to me again and will do everything possible to avoid me.I've not been needy or relied on her and have treaded carefully with her, I feel her heart isn't in the friendship anymore. I don't love her or want her to be my girlfriend and never have seeked anything else. I'm pondering whether to defriend on social media and feel as though I'm talking to someone who doesn't exist.feel completely lost and work isn't the same without her and she said we made a good team to me before which made me feel happy.What should I do? Is she playing playing a game or is she developing feelings for me and is scared to tell me how she actually feels?I'd appreciate the advice and help you can offer me.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2016): That's what I thought aunt honesty, When people go away they forgot about others and when I was friends with someone in the past this has happened and I feel as though history will repeat itself, I'll do what you say, I am and your right, it's weird because we used to talk at work and now things have changed, I'll let you know what happens, and I'd ask friends but don't want to come across as hercule poirot.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (1 June 2016):
 Is it possible that she is just busy? It sounds like you are expecting a lot from her at the moment, while she might not have a lot off time at the moment to herself. Why not drop her an e-mail or text and ask her is everything okay?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2016): Thanks for the advice. I do because I get on well with her, hence why i call her my best friend. I'm positive that i dont as id know about it. Something is but if she wont reply back. How am i able to find out. Do you think i should leave a letter at work for her when she gets back. Im running out of options as to what to do for the best.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (1 June 2016):
 Are you sure you don't have feelings for her? Because people don't feel this intensely just for a friend.
I think you're in denial. You've developed strong romantic feelings for her and that's why you're feeling rejected when she's distancing herself away from you.
Something has to have happened for her to have started avoiding you in this way and I don't think it's because developing feelings for you. If she did, she would most likely have told you or acted on it.
You refer to her as your best friend, surely you can ask her what's wrong. Unfriending people on social media for no good reason is really puerile. It's very immature. Either don't add someone as a friend or just stop getting updates from then but unless there's a good reason, don't do something this childish.
As for you, you need to figure out what you feel for her and accept the possibility that there's no future to a relationship. Even the friendship is shaky at this point of time and 7 months apart might not really help. As I said, talk to her. That's all you can do really.
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