A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So I've been seeing this guy for a year now and he has been unemployed for 8months. He has a visa stay in Italy but he can't find a job cause is hard there.I live in the UK and I've been sending him money and visiting him.But now I'm not sure this relationship will work.I'm tired of supporting him financially. and he's sometimes moody and I've noticed he avoids me whenever I'm ill. (No phones or text to check up on me:( I've had a bad cold for 2days now and I've not heard from him. He knows I'm ill:(We were talking last week and it sounds like he wants me to marry him and bring him to the UK.I don't ever want to do that. I've seen guys leave girls after they've helped them the most.Should I end this relationship? How should I end it?I thought I loved him but I don't think he feels the same. He's properly just using me.
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female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (9 September 2014):
"how should I end it?"
just stop all contact and stop sending any money. He cant come over there so there is nothing he can do. He is using you and you can find a better guy of any nationality in the uk. Im sorry you got caught up in this situation but you know you need to get rid of him. Dont even give him an explanation, you owe him nothing! Good luck with your life, all the best x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2014): This has been going on a long time - maybe you'll dump him this time round.http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-support-my-boyfriend-financially-so-why-does.html
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (9 September 2014):
I agree with the post below. Ditch this man asap. He's using you.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (9 September 2014):
 I think you already know what's up with this guy. You say you "think he is using you. Honey, YOU KNOW he is using you.
I'm sorry it's NOT a GF's (or BF's) duty to financially take care of their LDR partner. Now it might be different if you two lived together, but... as you seem to have realized he isn't really into you. He wants money & visa from you. That is about it.
How much money (all in all) have you sent to him?
I'd say cut him off from the money and see how long he sticks around .....
Or even better dump his moochy ass, and find a man who can take care of himself, who lives closer to you and who will CARE for you and about you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2014): It is as clear as day that he is using you. Just stop all communication. He will panic when he senses he's losing his hold on you. But don't give in. He's sensed he's found a 'sucker'. He's probably got umpteen other women all sending him money whilst he's hanging out in bars in Italy and screwing other women. He will use you for visa reasons and then will be nowhere to be seen.
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A
male
reader, Mark1978 +, writes (9 September 2014):
 Dear oh dear! Smell the coffee please before you get hit financially and used as a visa to stay in the UK.
Why send him money when he is clearly not interested if you are ill or well? All he wants is your money. Clear and simple. On top of that, h claims he wants to marry you so he can live in the UK. Ditch this user right now is my advice.
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