A
female
age
36-40,
*otkirby
writes:hi, i have been with my bfriend for 1 year we live toghether and are happy, the thing is he is always at the gym! we both work fulltime, he goes to the gym after work and on saturdays, he finishs work at 5pm and doesnt get home until 8.30ish pm! he has always done this, wen i hav confronted him saying its unfair to me everynite to have to see my friends and have dinner on my own rather than waiting around for him he says 'ok i will quit the gym' now i know that wud be silly cos then he wud make me guilty and he wud get unfit, the compromise we came to is he will have sundays off. then some nights after the gym he does some paperwork from his job! we have a gr8 sex life and make each other laugh! am i being selfish?
View related questions:
sex life Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, spirited  +, writes (30 August 2007):
Our situation is similar, I live w/ my boyfriend of over a year and the gym is a DAILY for him also. But he has his reasons for going. Be happy he isn't a guy that goes to a bar everynight and drinks up around a bunch of women. Believe it or not, your boyfriend might concern himself w/ the gym so much as to impress you and maybe to entice to join in sometimes. I go w/ my boyfriend now, not everyday, but 3 or 4 days out of the week. And about the cooking, I do understand, b/c I cook daily as well. Tell him that you understand that he likes to take care of himself but that you cook for both of you with love and would like to sit and share the meal together. Once he sees your willingness to compromise, he should compromise as well and cut his sessions a little shorter. He might even be getting home later b/c he's not looking forward to hearing you complain about it (I did as well at first, it's natural).
Give a little and take a little. In the process, you will become healthier, and will spend more time together doing something he likes. Maybe on Sundays you can get him to go with you to do something you like.
I hope this helps. Feel free to drop me any questions.
Take care!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2007): mabey you could arrange to go to the gym with him so its a win/win situation and you will get some exercise too, and if its an all male gym then mabey you could find one that has facilities for both males and females!
=) good luck!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2007): hi, i feel in the same boat as you, for there is so much similarities. he stays later at work, most ofthe time gets home at 7-8ish pm when leaves at 6:30am...its like in and out the door. i cook everyday and its like dinner for 2, but only 1 is the attendee. This is not what i have signed myself up for, so, I have left him since i was a priority to him as i thought i was.No, you are not being selfish. Of course, he should be able to go to the gym but he can do it every other day or try to alternate. Sounds more like he is being inconsiderate to you and this hurts you. You are worthy to get his attention and ask him to be there for you (and not just only when he wants you in bed). If he cares much, he would try to finda solution which he can balance both. you and the gym. He needs to chage his priorities. But if he doesnt, girl you need to feel like the princess, then look at other options like not hving him around totally and prioritize urself.
...............................
|
