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female
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anonymous
writes: I have been having problems at home relating to the relationnship between my son and his step-father (my partner who I am now about to split up with). Because I was so worried about my son so much, I went to the doctors, to cut a long story short we were referred to a childrens charity for family therpy. There my partner and I saw a social worker to try and work through it. After a couple of sessions I saw her on my own (my son and I also see her now and again as well) The end result was that I decided that the relationship between my parner and I was not to work and are currently splitting up. The thing is that since that one session I have had with her , I have been seeing her every week and have grown really fond of her and I think it has developed into a whole lot more. There were times in these sessions where we would flirt with each other and at Christmas I wrote her a letter to say thank you and that I thought that she was lovely and I could'nt of got through this time without her, but I haven't said anymore than that.I have noticed that a ring that she would normally wear is no longer on since seeing her in the new year, and Im not sure what to think. I have never felt this way about a woman before and Im sure she must have some idea that there is something going on as she has dealt with people over a number years, but I want to get this out in the open and discuss it, but it does not seem approriate talking about this at work and I don't know what to do. I cannot stop thinking about her. Please help.
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female
reader, Dawnest +, writes (11 January 2006):
Your feelings for your social worker are normal because she is kind/understanding and non judgemental and you feel like she is now the only friend in your life.
BUT dont expect anything to happen between you her professional ethics will not allow herto get involved with a patient. She's your friend, treat her as such but dont put her in an awkward situation by making any moves as she will be duty bound to ask for a transfer.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your anwers, mommyofthree, you given me some very good advice and I know you are right, Im not sure what it is I want at the moment, all I know is that I feel very strongly towards this person, but I have to be sensible about this and have some time on my own and complete the sessions my son I have with the social worker.If this is real and its mean't to be then maybe not now, maybe not even this year but one day if its mean't to be its mean't to be. Thank you also to auntyalice and the other anwers also, you have all helped me.
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A
female
reader, mommyofthree +, writes (10 January 2006):
 It is normal during difficult times to attatch ourselves emotionally to someone that seems stable to us. While your feelings for her are real feelings, I wonder if you are maybe misinterpreting them as something more than a deep appreciation and respect. I am not sure if telling the therapist would help your situation, as I believe therapists are supposed to abide by a certain code of ethics that does not allow them to have personal relationships with their patients. Maybe you should switch your therapist to a new one so that you can heal from the relationship that is ending and not immediately attatch yourself to someone new. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, aunty alice +, writes (10 January 2006):
ypu may want to discuss it with her but what if it is not how you think it is and she is just trying to be friendly after all it is her job to be friendly and welcoming maybe you should ask her if she wants to go out for the evening with you and a couple of friends and get to knoww her a bit better and build A FRIENDSHIP with her before you tell her but you also have to think about your son and how this will effect him
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2006): If your son was upset about his step father, he will be probly much more upset at this new news. Your son needs stability in his life and not a lot of new changes right now.
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