A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I need help! I meet this guy at a bar we exchanged numbers went on 2nd date. He has a bit of an ego but I kinda liked it. But he turned me off because he kept talking about all the money he had that he had everything he wanted. We went to a hotel the 2nd night slept together in the morning while he was asleep I dug in his pockets and took a $100.00 bill never told him. He dropped me off to my car I told him that I don't have sex like this with someone I barely know. He got mad and said why you wana talk about it now. He said that I was very confusing we had some more words nothing major. He called me on the way home we exchanged more words and I basically told him to have a nice night and got off the phone. A couple hours later he texted me saying I was foul all I had to do was ask that I'm a thief and he threatened me a bunch of times. I tried to lie and says the money was mixed up in all the clothes and stuff and I thought it was mine. He didn't believe me. I feel so bad!!!!!!! I really really like him. He told me to keep it. I unfortunately have took money from all men that I've dated in the past. I had bf for 3 years and I tool money from him all the time. Not sure if he knew but he never accused me. I had another bf took his money too he found out and joked with me about it. This new guy has me scared! I know its wrong and I have learned my lesson not to do it again and I will just ask from now on. I really want this new guy to forgive me but he won't talk to me at all! It's kinda a turn on to me in a way I know I'm crazy!!! Help I don't know what to do? We both frequently go to the same bar and I'm scared that he will be there with his entourage and do something to me!I need to clear my name and make him forgive me. I've been praying for forgiveness everyday since this incident and I totally am ashamed and I may have missed out on a guy that could of been good for me. Please someone help!!!!!!
View related questions:
exchanged numbers, money, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Moonknight  +, writes (7 October 2010):
 Strange story for an adult i must say, i'm guessing you didn't even need the money...He's probably pissed off at your attitude more than anything else and not the money, saying you don't usually bed a guy you barely know and all that is just foolish...
The other answers to your question are pretty spot on and tim says it well, you will of course do it again if nothing happens to you until the day something does happen to you, but if this guy does decide to do something to you, i highly doubt it's over money, you've probably said some nasty stuff.
The question is... why... why steal from him? why say you don't usually sleep with people you barely know when you just did... why fight with him?
Power issues a side, this to me sounds like a when a person lie... not because they need to but purely because they just have to because it's the way they grew up.
I don't think you'd actually get help on this so i will say to you, Grow up!
A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (7 October 2010):
 You need to clear your name? You've been stealing from the guys you are with? Come clean, be honest, return the money and go get professional help. You have some sort of compulsion or a complete lack of self-control or no morals. A mental health professional could help you figure it out, if you are serious about fixing it. Otherwise, you're just wasting everyone's time here. Go seek counselling.
...............................
A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (7 October 2010):
 You clearly have not learned your lesson, you're just upset because you got caught. You have a serious problem and need to seek help. Stealing is absolutely not OK. I can't believe someone hasn't already pressed charges. Send him the money back immediately whether he says he wants it or not and get help. If you keep this up eventually someone will press charges and you will go to jail.
...............................
A
female
reader, daniel007  +, writes (7 October 2010):
well wat u did is really reaaly wrong bt as u have admitted it here its k. Similarly admit it in front of him and ask for forgiveness bt do not cry too much as uit cud seen as acting or so.Very very decently ask for forgiveness , say u have done it before as oder boys were taking advantage of you but u wen u did it this time u realy are upset and ashamed and really feeling bad as you have developed feelings for him and this is the 1st time u r sorry truly and deeply...li'l bit of acting is required to have a guy in your hand but that is only to prove and support your genuinness and true guilt...text him if he doesnt pick up your call and if that doesnt work ask a true good friend to call from Public booth and convince him...try your luck and make him realize how special he is for you..and if he really does not pay attention at any efforts do leave him as truthful person shud be forgiven n rewarded and not always punished ..he shud instead value youalso..if he has punished you for your mistakes by ignoring you..u seem good lady as you are honest!!! take care..keep smiling...
...............................
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (7 October 2010):
 Do what Tim says but first send the guy back his 100 bucks.
...............................
A
female
reader, Nime +, writes (7 October 2010):
 Have you ever been diagnosed with kleptomania? Items with significant monetary value (like money, of course) are not usually items a kleptomaniac would steal, but your stealing sounds obsessive-compulsive by the hectic way you described it. Perhaps you should start seeing a psychologist. However, if you have a real motivation to steal money, perhaps to buy things, especially drugs, I'd say this is an issue of 'morals', although one might argue that falls under the domain of psychology too.
As for now, I advise you to find a way to return the money with a sincere letter of apology. Explain you have had this problem with men in the past, that it is obsessive-compulsive (as far as I can tell), that you recognize you have a problem (you did say you're crazy), and that you would like it if you could be at least on civil terms in the future.
...............................
A
male
reader, TimmD +, writes (7 October 2010):
 You haven't learned your lesson. You are only sorry because you got caught. You need to forget about this man and get some help regarding your issue, because there IS a deeper issue at hand. Perhaps it's a power thing, trying to take power away from a man, etc... I don't know. All I know is this wasn't an isolated incident. That, and you're giving him crazy mixed signals. Going to a hotel on the second date then afterwards telling him you don't have sex with people you barely know? This also sounds like a power thing. Giving the man something he wants and then taking it away.
Get some help. Don't laugh this off or take this lightly, you need professional help before you get hurt or thrown in jail. Seriously.
...............................
|
