A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:It’s been 9 months and i still miss my long distance boyfriend….i miss everything we had..i miss how it used to be..how he was my best friend and love in the same person..i miss the emotional closeness we had, i miss the care and understanding..i miss how perfect it was….it hurts so much that he always shows up when i think i’m over him just to realise how wrong i was…it all still makes me cry..even now i can’t help crying..and i started a new long distance relationship, we’re supposed to meet in 4 weeks and i feel like this..what am i supposed to do?please don’t start how long distance relationships don’t work..i don’t care honestly..i have my reasons and i’m fed up for being blamed all the time
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best friend, long distance, miss my ex, my ex Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you guys...i do think that i will try to get to know this new guy and do my best to be over the other guy..i'm aware of the fact that i won't be with him ever anymore and also that even if we got back together things wouldn't be the same...
i'm thinking of giving the new guy a chance..and a new chance to myself as well...
btw he knows about my ex and how much he meant to me..he even said if i want to talk about my ex to him it's okay..
i don't want to lose him because of dwelling in the past..
A
female
reader, adamantine  +, writes (8 June 2011):
 I was in a very similar situation to you.. except the new guy knew about my last relationship.. and rather than trying to jump into things, he was just there for me as a friend. We became best friends over time, and I realised he's like my other half. Give yourself some time first. Get to know this new guy and decide whether or not you want to do it again.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2011): I disagree. I think you need this to help you forget about your ex. if your ex was right for you then you would still be with him now. go see him and have a good time.UKLifecoach
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (8 June 2011):
 LDRs can work. but they are hard.
IF you still are grieving the loss of the last LDR you may not be ready to have a new relationship yet....perhaps you can back off on meeting till you are ready...
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (8 June 2011):
 Ok well hunny if you are still missing your last boyfriend that badly well then it is clear you are not over him, and in that case I dont think it is a new idea meeting this new guy and being in another relationship. I really think you need to take some time on your own being single and concentrate on getting over your ex. If you are not over him well then its not fair on your boyfriend. You need some time out on your own to sort out your head and get over your ex.
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A
female
reader, RedAthena +, writes (8 June 2011):
 Sounds like you are not ready to start a new relationship. You still have unresolved feelings with the former.There are pitfalls and peaks with ANY relationship, but you increase the pitfalls with a LDR. Personally, I think there are some things relationships that start online that should be reserved for when you meet face to face..one of them being relationship titles of bf/gf (see if you click real life first!) And my personal boundary of "I Love You's" being said ONLY when you can look the person in the eye (and not thru a monitor webcam). I love you is that special. If you get closer to your meeting date with the new interest and still feel like you are looking back and not forward...be honest with the guy and postpone the meeting.Heal your heart first before you are ready to share it with another.Best Wishes.
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