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male
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anonymous
writes: I'm currently still undergoing the getting over the ex-gf phase. It's been 6 months now since she left me, and during these six months i've been trying really hard to get over her. I've been going to the gym everyday, going out with friends and learning musical intruments etc... There are times/moments where i do look back at the things we do together and miss those moments alot (late night shopping, road trip to sydney etc...) but most of the time i try to forget about it and move on.Everything was good so far until recently when i got back to university. We go to the same university but doing different courses. Today i saw her for the first time in many many months. The moment i saw her step out of the tram everything that i have done during the past months seems to have all been a waste... The moment i saw her, all the memories that we've spent together just all came back and i realise how much i still do love and care about her... She didn't see me so we didn't talk or anything, but i'm getting back into the depression stage, missing her and just thinking stupid thoughts...Does anyone have any advice on what i should do?
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male
reader, rama  +, writes (2 December 2008):
Rules for guys:
1)dont feel guilty to rebound.try gettin lucky with every chick in town,this way u'll make her think,which is good.
2)act like everything is too cool at ur end ,this will make her want u.
3)never hurt the gal u rebounding with.u can do tis by not tellin her i love u,i miss u...things like tis.
4)concentrate on being the best in watever u do .i know at times u wonder ,"should i become something big to win her back"YES tat exactly true.
WINNERS HAVE IT EASY
5)YOUR THE MAN,if u truly love her ,stop saying so.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2008): Be strong. I went to www.askmen.com/dating/curtsmith_100/139_dating_advice.html
and read their column on it.
It was hard for me, and it might be everything everyone else has told you, but just realize that you're better than her. She's not the best thing that's ever going to happen to you. That one is still out there, in your future. Love yourself, and sit tight. "She" is still out there and one day when you least expect it, she'll hit you and totally sweep you off your feet, as you will her.
Take care of yourself. Always look out for #1 (you).
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A
male
reader, jphiz  +, writes (3 May 2008):
hey,
ive been going out with my girl for a little under a year,we've had out ups and downs, and yesterday she broke up with me, she says that im not for her and im too immature, i guess in a sense i am a bit immature but i told her im willing to work on that like ive worked on so many other things while i was in this relationship. i dont no what i should do i want her back so badly but i dont think shes going to take me back and its geting to me, ive already had thoughts of suicide some one please help
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2008): My girl of one year went from wanting to have my baby, and searching for house for us to live in to telling me she didnt love me, in a matter of weeks. She said she wants to love me but cant. That there must be something wrong with her that she cant fall in love with me. About a mounth after our break up I went out on a date. She had a complete breakdown, called me. Foolishly I went to her apartment and made love to her. The next day she was back to not wanting to be with me. We did this whole back and forth thing for about a mounth and a half. Then she went to visit her parents, made out with some dude, calls me in the middle of the night to tell and hoped it was ok since we where both moving on. I was devestated and told her i never wanted to hear from her again. I caved a couple of days later and called her. We had a weird situation and I left her place in the middle of the night. Now we talk every couple of weeks. She calls i never do, and wants to know how i am. she asks me several times in one coversation how i am. Im just trying to move on but dont realy know how. I hang out with friends more, take classes, and try to work as much as i can. But still as soon as i wake up, i think of her.HELP
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2008): I'm not sure i have any advise, but im in a similar situation. Me and my ex split from each other 2 months ago and i was left absolutly devastated!! Especially when a week later he was getting with sum1 esle and now they are going out. Like you we are at the same university so this makes getting over him 10 times worse. After i did the whole depression stage i too have been keeping fit, lost weight, made lots of freinds and have been snowboarding, basically getting on with my life! but my ex happens to live a round the corner with 3 of my best mates. They say you should not be mates with an ex but i have no choice really or things would be awkawrd for everyone. Its hard but you just have to pull through!When i got back form christmas break and saw my ex for the first time since our split, it was the hardest thing to be around him and not be with him.and like you i felt like i was back to square 1 and so i just had to start again and getting my life back on track. The hardest thing is i tend to see him randomly a couple times a week which makes the whole getting over process even harder but you have to remember no matter how much you still love them and care about them, if they dont feel the same nemore why waste your feelings on them, go out on dates and meet new people, dont let ur self get depressed again, keep your mind busy on other things, think about all the things youv bin able to do since the split that you couldnt do beofore.i'm sorry if my advise is rubbish but im still getting thru the same doffereculites as you but hope it helps
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2008): I've been with my girlfriend for over 6yrs now. I am also going on 5 to 6 months which is considered break she calls it. It has been so damn hard bcuz she says it is me.I have disrespected her and her friends. I never meant to disrespect her and her friends. But we used to go out and I would drink to much and just start saying really bad things to her friends. I never really liked her friends. One for my b-day I got so drunk and threw money at my girls face while her cousin was there watching everything. My girlfriend has lied to me plenty of times. I just think I never gotten over it. She tells me I have to relax. But everytime I lay back. She does something else behind my back. So we talk about it. But than we go out again and I get drunk I just curse her out like why the FU** you lied to me. I love her. We have been thru so much I can't begin to say. One time she caught me chaeting on her. It was my fault. But in time she left it alone and we moved on. Anyway what I'm trying to say is just stay positive. I have been getting with other girls to see if that would help but it doesn't. I still feel like crap. I speak to my girl everyday. She tells me I annoy her and have disresected her that's why she has taken a break from me. I told her is this break to meet other people. She says hell no. Just time away from me. I don't believe her. I understand my faults and am trying to work things out. Bcuz I want to marry her. But I still find her lying about stupid things that gets me mad. She's also created a myspace and never told me about it. I found out only bcuz my friend saw it. She had sexy pictures on her page. What a bitch I said. And she also put that she was DIVORCED. What the hell was that about. I confronted her about her myspace page. I told her I thought we were on break. "She said yeah and, so why put you are divorced on ur page. She really pissed me off than. I know this is a long story but the conclusion is You have to be strong and always stay positive. This situation has not caused any health problems to you. So just keep ur head up and find other things to keep you from going mad over her.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 December 2007): to be honest mate, im 16 and am in a v similar boat to you.
I thoguht I was over her (6 months 1st december) and then I had a dream I got back with her and woke up really sad cz its not real. I want her back so bad.
I really feel alone and as if im in limbo, as if something is genuinly missing
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A
female
reader, Farris  +, writes (28 February 2007):
 Getting over someone is one of the hardest things to do, and your exact situation is an example of that; one step forward, two steps back.
Do not fret... You spent time and energy going into all sorts of great activities that have helped eased the pain. Do not give these up. Carry on exactly the same way as you have been for the last six months. I'm not saying it's easy, but with time, you'll learn to deal with those feelings of sadness, and they will fade... Just as they already have been. This may feel like a major setback, but I'm sure you'll feel much better again in a while.
And don't worry, EVERYTHING you're feeling is completely natural. Heartbreak is a completely universal thing.
Just be strong, and good luck.
Let us know how you are.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2007): I undrestand how you feel , and that is natural, but I tell you it was a good reason that it didn't worked out between you two. Going back there you are just opening up a old wound, and if you get hurt the effect will be 10 times worse. Please just try to move on, keep youself busy, and force these thoughts out of your head. Keep busy with friends, find new friends, there are alot out there you can do and enjoy.
Don't let anyone to play with your feelings and emotions, you worth much more than that, and it is only you who can control it. What you are feeling is natural, but don't let it get out of your control.
Good luck and all the best
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