A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Furious BF is still talking to ex lovers. Sending them messages 'Hey Sexy miss you.' Why do I keep putting up with this? I know its wrong and that I shouldnt put up with it yet I still continue too. Even if he hasnt cheated on me sending messages to other women like that is wrong. He never calls me sexy Yet sais he needs someone like me coz im a good girl. I hate being taken advantage off =( Why cant I just leave it... im not normally like this...
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2011): I'm so sorry your going through this....as I read, I found my own story unfolding. My BF has done the same thing to me and then some....When I found out I was devastated, I confronted him and told him it was not only disrespectful to me, but showed me he was not a man of honor. I told him that it had to stop immediately of I was leaving. He told me it would stop, and to this day, from what I can see, it has. I say confront him, tell him if it doesn't you will leave and let him make the choice if his friendships with his ex's are worth loosing you. And if he chooses his ex's, it was never meant to be. I know that it will be hard if it ends, but always remember you are worth more than that. There are times I still know I am worth more than what mine can give and there are times I still think I should have left when the leavin was good.Good luck to you, and I hope this helped a little.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2011): Honey deep down inside you know you deserve so much better. The reason why you stay could be a combination of things, scared to be alone, afraid you'll never find another one, you think that's the best you can do, but the common thread in all those is a lack of self-esteem and no sense of self-worth.
You need to take time out and figure out why it is you feel this way and work on it rather than wasting energy on a dead end situation with this guy who is clearly disrespecting you.don't put up with it, you can and will do bettet but the first step is to believe that whole-heartedly and do what's best for you and just leave him be.
Best of luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2011): Why do you keep putting up with it? At a rough guess I would say you are scared of being alone. If you don't like the way he is treating you then don't let him.
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A
male
reader, shawncaff  +, writes (3 April 2011):
 I think if you continue to stay in a relationship like this it indicates a problem with your self-esteem. There is no excuse for this. He should not be doing this. Period. And if you allow him to continue, his actions will get worse, believe me.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe mentioned she was a slut once to me that was it. I have found other messages to his ex and other women that were totally innappropriate in the past. He always has an excuse. He has lied to me about his contact with certain women to including his ex.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous1996 +, writes (3 April 2011):
 Speaking to his exes: hmmmm, tolerable. But not something you should put up with regularlySending flirty texts to his exes: UNACCEPTABLE!!!! Especially if they say things like 'Hey sexy'DO NOT PUT UP WITH THIS!You need to confront him about it, and if he doesn't stop, then LEAVE HIM!You deserve better, don't let him walk all over youAnd you you know that you're being taken advantage of and being used, which makes this all worse!You need to get some self-confidence, because you, and every girl out there, deserves so much better!You're amazing, and one day you will find your soul-mate, but if you stay with this a**-Hole, that will never happen.If you have self esteem issues, maybe see a counselor, they will help you!Also, your 18-21, who needs this type of crap at your age!? You need to move on, and have some fun girl!!!!!You're still young, and are only young for so long, so live life to the fullest, and get out there and live!!!Hope this helped!-Kind regards, Jordyn
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2011): we are all looking for validation and love. we expect that what we give will be reciprocated. sometimes we wait it out- all the pain and confusion, hoping that its just us and try to let it slide. because when we do end things, we are still hurting and confused and no answers can be found. im sorry you're going through this- trust me, i'm in the same boat in a way.
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