A
male
age
36-40,
*ames Thomas
writes:Long story short, she is the first girl I have ever had deep feelings for and I didn't know how to handle that so after couple of months I became clingy. Every time I look back on how I acted I feel like kicking myself because, rather than just being myself (which was working well), I let my emotions overload my brain which turned me into a completely gutless wuss. Now don't misunderstand, I'm not the macho, beat on my chest, he-man type (I'm actually pretty reserved and a bit of a softie to be honest). But I do know that a woman likes to know that her man is strong and independent as well as sensitive and attentive to her needs (and wants) and all of the above come naturally to me (the real me, not the lovestruck idiot me) which is why she liked me to begin with. SO... if anyone, especially you ladies, could offer any input as to what I need to do to show her that I have a grip on myself now, or what she might need to hear from me so that we can get back together, Or even if you think that I screwed things up beyond repair and should just forget about it, I will be eternally grateful if you would share that info with me.
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female
reader, Twistedbaby420 +, writes (2 May 2009):
 I'm assuming she broke things off with you and that she told you it was because you became too clingy? Please correct me if that assumption is wrong.
If that is the case, and that is the only reason she gave you for ending things, then perhaps you should try calling her and seeing if she would like to meet over coffee sometime soon, because you'd like to talk to her about some things. If she says no, then I would back off and give her her space. Let her know that if she would ever be interested in doing that, she can call you. If she says yes, then I would suggest perhaps apologizing to her for coming off as a little overbearing, and explain to her that you just really liked her a lot and couldn't help but want to be around her. If she perceives this positively, you could ask if she would be interested in perhaps going out again (on a date) or maybe trying things again, slowly. At this point she'll hopefully be honest with you about how she thinks and feels about everything, and from this you'll be able to figure out if you "screwed things up beyond repair." Good luck!
A
female
reader, LilzDon'tKnow +, writes (2 May 2009):
 well one thing most ladies are a good ducker for is flattery and then a good romantic, you know the secret letter giving with mind puzzling hints of who you are. not to mention your going to have to apologizer for being that way and explain why you did that. a flower would be nice to say sorry. and just let her know everything you typed here. i'm sure she'll understand. and if not then why would you want someone who doesn't know how to forgive?
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A
female
reader, crissy6288  +, writes (2 May 2009):
Have you tried telling her how you feel and what you think you did wrong. To me when a guy is clingy I know that he either really loves/likes me or maybe that's just the way he is, maybe she is unsure of who the real you is. Tell her who you are and tell her why you acted the way you did. If your worth anything to her, as much as she is to you she will give you the chance to explain and if I were her I would give you another chance. But you have to be yourself if your faking it and lying to her she will know. Girls like it when your true to yourself and true to them.
Goodluck :)
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A
female
reader, iSmil3y +, writes (2 May 2009):
Tell her what you just told us. Let her know that you love her and you let your emotions take control and you weren't yourself and let her know you've gotten control and tell her you'd like a second chance. Just tell her whats been on your mind and maybe she'll give you another chance.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2009): My friend had a problem with a clingy ex boyfriend...it made her feel uncomfortable. You should talk with her, admit you messed up and tell her you're sorry and might want to start over fresh. Ask what she wants, what makes her comfortable. My boyfriend is not clingy and we give each other the space we need and we have a good relationship. Just sit and talk with her and see what you get from it. Be sure to post and update so we can see how it went.
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