A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ive slept with my friend a few times now and things were progressing until I got drunk at a pub and scared him... I know he likes me... Is there anyway I can fix this? Ever since we have had sex, the friendship has changed... which I knew it would, but it seems the foundation we built as friends is slowly being taken away... the things I used to do when we were friends that he used to find endearing are now scaring him off? Why is he changing the rules without telling me? He has never had a GF and he is 27... He isnt experienced with women at all and always talks to me about his "stalkers" (girls that obviously call and text him too much) he used to drunk text me all the time and vice versa... but now when I do it.. Im clingy? WTF?! I know when I ignore him he hates it and he always comes flocking back... so what gives with this guy? Is he just scared? Its a pretty huge deal that we have hooked up... Ive known him since I was 3 years old....
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 December 2009): Of course the friendship is changing, you started having sex with your friend without the romance, without him telling you that he has romantic feelings for you.You simply hooked up. Sadly when you take a casual approach like this to relationship, then the guy can just as easily unhook from you.He is changing the rules because he doesn't want a relationship with you, he doesn't sound very mature to me talking about his "stalkers". I think your friend is what can be called a player. He isn't ready to settle down with one special girl and if he does it probably will be just because he finds it too hard to continue to juggle women, not because he is in it for the long haul.He is pretty young, and this isn't the time of his life where he wants to settle down. He isn't ready, he isn't financially at a place in his life where he wants the white picket fence the two car garage and the wife and the kids.If you want to continue the casual sex, then let him call you and stop texting him so much, unless it is a booty call, then I am sure he will be right over.
A
male
reader, Jager  +, writes (28 December 2009):
I doubt he only wants sex because he hasn't been in a relationship before. i think you know full well what you got to do. Back off quit the drink for a bit let him come to you reply to every other text not every text.
its a really big deal that you guys are getting together as you known him for so long. So waiting a little longer to make sure it goes well wont be a problem. Just dont mention being an item and give him the rains for a bit.
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