A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I started dating a girl few weeks ago, we really liked each other, she is 4 years younger than me , she is very decent, nice and has a great personality, the thing is she is super busy with her full time job and her master degree , she also has some other commitments like family and friends etc so she has a very little time for me. I am not that busy, especially at this time, everything going slow at my work and most of my friends and relatives are married and they have very little time for me, so I am very lonely and I have a lot of free times. I have been trying to meet her since 10 days but she is always busy and gives excuses , I invited her for dinner last night but she declined saying that she is meeting a friend of her for coffee, I was kind of pissed off, actually this is my problem I want things to happen my way, I am not very flexible, I have been trying to change this attitude but I always fail and this resulted in losing my ex gf. so I went home and started to drink, was a boring Sunday night, then I texted her shit ! I know that I shouldn’t text while I am drunk but I was drunk and tried to stay away from my phone but ended up texting her ! “I said I liked you a lot, but it seems you don’t, I think about you all the time, but you are not there, I always initiate and suggest plans and you never did, I really hate the way you treated me ! she replied , you are so mean!” I realized this morning the shit I said, I apologized and I told her how embarrassed I am , she said, its fine I still like you, I understand. Now I feel that I cant face her, I cant look at her eyes, I really regret what I didwhat should I do, I feel so bad, so naïve , so immature and so stupid Can you tell me what could be a good approach? what should be my next step
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male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (11 April 2016):
This was actually a good test. :)
If she still wants to talk to you after that, and she is willing to let it go...then she is an amazing person.
Now that you know that...treat her as such in the future...drunk or not.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (11 April 2016):
 What do you do?
You apologized, she accepted the apology VERY gracefully. So now you accept that you acted like a prat and you LEARN from it.
There is no excuse for this. It's 100% avoidable. But in the same breath you are not the first person to drunk text something ridiculous. And what you texted wasn't totally horrible, it was a tad whiny and passive-aggressive but it could have been worse. So stop beating yourself up over that. What's done it done.
However, what you might also have to accept is that this girl is NOT into you and the drunk texting ONLY made it clear to her that your personality and attitude is something SHE might not want in a partner. And that... you will have to accept as well.
I think, if she is NOT trying to make time to meet up with you, she really IS NOT interested. She might like you as a person, but not interested in dating you. She hasn't told you that up front because she doesn't want to be rude. I think she presumes that by NOT agreeing to going out with you, you will eventually figure out that SHE isn't interested.
Sorry. I think you should work on yourself and your attitude a bit. You already lost ONE GF because of it... You will lose more if you keep it doing the same thing over and over.. Once you get better at compromising and reading people... you try another girl.
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A
female
reader, Pureflame  +, writes (11 April 2016):
go and meet her face to face. Sending a text for an apology just won't do. Face her and be sincere
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