A
female
age
30-35,
*Charliix
writes:Hey, Might remember me from two posts about me liking (well loving) a teacher? Well you may also remember I sent the first post in december of last year.5 months on and nothing has changed. Well not nothing... the feelings have progressed and I really really like him now..So many people like teachers.. Yet I don't think this is just a stupid crush.. It has to mean something.. I know that sounds like wishful thinking, yet I really think it does. And if that isn't worse enough.. I think he knows I like him too. He hasn't backed off though-instead got more chatty and smiley. He always puts his hand on my arm or shoulder when he says hi or are you alright? And I keep noticing him looking at me in classes and assemblies. And I'm not just saying that because I want something to happen, because I don't think I actually do.. I mean I do.. But I don't.. It's so confusing.. SeriouslyI just want to get over him.. Nothing seems to distract me from it.. Work.. friends.. other guys (who are all pricks so that doesn't help). Those things only distract me a limited time, then before I know it i'm imagining him coming over to my house and telling me he loves me.Which is obviously far fetch,,I just am really REALLY sick of it now.. I just want to find someone to love and care for me.. not like my parents or family.. someone affectionate.. And he ticks all the boxes.. for some reason... :(I'm just feeling like I'm never going to find anyone I can actually have. Last year, for the whole year I fancied my mate who had asked me out and i said no because i didn't want it affecting our friendship.. then as soon as he got a girlfriend (who he's still with) I like fell in love with him for about a year.. Im over him now.. but everyone I fall for I can't have.. I've NEVER fallen for a teacher before.. I've never seen the attraction.. but why now? when I'm older, more mature and experience with boys and guys. Surely falling for a teacher is something a year 7 or 8 does because they just admire them and don't know about love.Im not much older than them.. but I never thought i was as weak as this to fall for someone in his position. Please don't say "nothing can happen" or "you have to try and get over him" etc.. because I KNOW.. and that's not exactly helpful really is it?I KNOW nothing can happen.. and if i was faced with it actually happening I don't think I would want it to be honest.. I don't know If I would anyway....Yet it's just like.. I want to get over him so much.. so why can't i..surely I control my own feelings.. so why can't i force myself to get over him.. because I've tried and seriously its not sodding working I can tell you... Every time I see him I just want to give him a huge hug and never let go.. theres just something about him I can't explain.. that just attracts me.. ?.. I don't go all shy and giggly anymore.. instead Im calm and relaxed around him.. I love talking to him and hate it when the conversations end.. His eyes are just so beautiful and deep..In his lesson the other day i was sat directly opposite him and he was talking so I looked up from my computer and looked at him whilst he talked. He then stopped and turned to look at me.. and for bout 10 secs we just stared into each eyes.. It was so serial.. but lush at the same time.... I then quickly put my head down and stared back at my computer.. yet in the corner of my eye I could see him still looking at me.. honestly. not making it up.. I then looked back up.. pretending just to scan the room and saw him quickly look away back to his computer .. that sounds far fetch I know.. but honestly believe me it happened.All over the weekend Ive been tryin to make sense of it.. and judge whether i meant anything.. "of course it didnt" you say.. but try being in my situation.. when he unnecessarily touches my shoulder to say hey.. he didnt need to touch my arm. why did he then? .. i would have replied at the same speed and the same answer without it.. was there a reason? or did he just feel like touching someone's arm and I was the first person he saw..?Every day.. this goes round my head.. so before you reply and tell me to grow up and get a life.. just think about how hard this is for a teenager in the mists of her GCSE's okay.. I don't like this anymore than you like hearing about it..Just be considerate with your comments and advice please.. should I talk to my student support about it? Im meeting up with her on tuesday? shall i say anything?Just help.. I'm literally on my last leg..Literally..
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crush, fell in love, my teacher, shy Reply to this Question
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female
reader, beaanx +, writes (9 May 2009):
Hey hun. i know exactly how you're feeling and what you're going through. i was in love with my teacher too, and i tell you, it's not easy to get over. I knew i had to get over him, so in the end, i went and spoke to my form tutor about it, to see if she could offer me any advice or help, and she did. she said it was completely normal to like a teacher, and that even she did. The advice she gave me was:1.)Find something i'm really interested in, and have apassion for, so that when theres nothing ni my mind, instead of it wandering tot hink of him, i will think about this thing that i have a passion for.2.)do the reverse, and actually enjoy being in his company.3.)get a book, and write all my feelings about him in it. but write them in form of song lyrics, or draw, or so some doodling, but as a way of expressing my feelings.i took all of these options onboard, and i have decided on all three. i know nothings ever going to happen, so when i'm in his class, i just enjoy being there. Also, i have taken up a new hobby, and my mind does go to it when theres nothing else to think about. Lastly, i now have a book, with one song in it, which i am actually quite happy with, hehe, and i have drawn lots in it! This advice actually helps me alot, and i'm getting over him wuite rapdily :)i hope this helped you with your problem :) good luck!
A
female
reader, I-like2help  +, writes (28 April 2009):
You can't really do anything about it , nothings going to make you change how you feel about him , he ticks your boxes and that's the way it is. I'm not gonna say your childish or tell you to grow up or that this is just plain weird because you know that already , people in your situation already no that and people never consider how hard it is for them , I think you should tell someone but maybe go to a teacher who's resonably young , maybe a PE teacher, and tell them there usually quite sympathetic but anyone you tell may take some form of action against the teacher you have feeling towards so keep that in mind , you could also tell the teacher you like about how you feel it's really up to you. I could probabley help you if I had a little more info if only read this entry I'm also gonna say something that will probabley make your heart sing but iv seen a teacher and student have an actual relationship it ain't impossible the student I'm gonna call her jane and the teacher George.
My friend jane went to a party and the were playing spin the bottle or something her pe teacher was there to but she didn't recognize him coz he wasn't wearing his glasses and was dressed like an 18 yr old she landed on him and kissed him after the game her teacher found her and they got talking and by the end of the night they were kissing . At school her timetable was changed and she was moved into his class they recognized each other imediatley they decided to stay together and once shed finished school they told every one that they were dating that was 2 yes ago now and there still together so it's not impossible but if you really love this teacher talk to him and discuss thing you might end up like jane and George. I know my story probabley didn't help but watevs
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A
female
reader, colts_fan_101  +, writes (14 April 2009):
Hey hun I'm not gonna tell you to get over it because I'm in a similar situation. In 9th grade I had an English teacher who was the most gorgeous man I had ever laid eyes on. We both flirted so much with each other through out the year and he would get sooo mad when I would hug my guy friends. He would just have this look on his face like he was disgusted. He knows I like him, it's so obvious. And now (I'm in 10th grade now) when we see each other around campus SOMETIMES he'll say hi and other times he'll just walk the other way. It hurts so much and I hope that your teacher doesn't ever purposely avoid you like mine is because let me tell you...it HURTS! I can relate to you when you said he looks at you then when you catch him he looks away because my teacher did the exact same thing. When he'd walk by my desk he would ALWAYS make sure that the side of his leg would brush against my arm. Or when he would walk behind my desk (I sat in the back of the room so no one was sitting behind me) he would gently touch my hair which sent chills down my back. I'm soooo confused too because like I said, one year later he acts as if last yr meant nothing. My friends know I like him and they joke about it but once he got PISSED because me and my best friend were by the bathroom and he walked by and my friend said "(my name) there's your man" I just looked at her and we giggled a bit cuz seriously I wasn't expecting her to say that. He looked at her with this hateful look. The comments didn't stop my friends kept saying little remarks when we would pass by him. I told them to stop and of course they didn't. I felt so bad about what my friends would say (they wouldn't say bad things they would just make fun of his favorite energy drink or just say "(my name) stop checking out (his name)". About 2 weeks ago the day before spring break I decided to apologize for the way my friends were acting. My heart was out of control and my stomache was burning. I walked up all the stairs to get to his class and right when I opened the door to walk through the long hall, who do I see walking down the hall coming in my direction? I was like "OMG" lol. So I walked towards him a little and he was just gona walk past me but I stopped him. I said I was sorry for the way my friends were acting and for what he has heard. He was such a jerk he was walking away while I was apologizing so I continued talking and just followed. So there we are NOBODY in the building except for the secretary in the office which is all the way on the other side of the building. He's walking down the stairs and he doesn't even face me once. Finally, still not facing me he said "They make me feel like I'm not even a person" and I said "You are more than a person to me". He didn't say anything and again I apologized. (By now we were at the end of the stairs) He began walking fast and said "No need to apologize". He walked off to get his coffee and there I was. Looking stupid and feeling rejected. I just stayed there at the bottom of the stairs and wiped my tears. I went to the bathroom and stayed in there until the bell rang. I didn't even reply to my friends when they were texting me asking where I was. I replay everything we've been through in my head all the time.
I know what you're going through and to be honest I wouldn't tell anyone. I told my friends and look what happened. Trust me write it in a diary just change the name but please don't tell anyone cuz it'll only lead to trouble.
best wishes :)
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A
female
reader, kitty_3 +, writes (8 April 2009):
 I know exactly how you feel, as i am going through something similar. i wish i could get over him and like someone my own age, but seeing him everyday in class makes it impossible to forget him. i've tried focusing on his (very few) flaws and distracting myself by listening to my ipod all the time, but nothing seems to help. i wish i had the answer-- believe me i do-- but i don't.
good luck and feel free to message me... especially if you find a way to forget him!
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A
female
reader, Neferterie +, writes (29 March 2009):
 It's okay, take a deep breath. Dont worry falling for a teacher is a very normal thing, and it happens to alot of teenage girls. As to the arm touching thing I would say this: It's a very normal thing for a person who is generally concerned with another persons well being to touch someone's arm, actually there are many studies that show that it gets the message of concerns across. If he held it there or caressed your skin, or closer to your chest, then you should be concerned with this.And as to the computer thing: Are you sure that he was looking at you? From what you put it seems you are and if he was and you felt uncomfortable then I would be concerned.In the end it really just boils down to this:*Are you feeling uncomfortable with him? *Do you feel that his attentions are not the best?If you feel as if his feelings toward you are unprofessional then I would say yes, go to your counsellor and talk about it. Its very normal for you to have a crush on your teacher, but it is not professional on his part to push his feelings onto you. Good luck and keep me informed!
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