A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello,My GF and i started dating about a week ago, and we hung out like 4 times before becoming official, and it was so much fun, we laughed alot and i really liked who she was alot.But mysteriously she changed as soon as we started dating, now she worries if i think shes ugly, or if im cheating on her, and she always talks about her exes and how they were or how they acted, and shes "bestfriends" with one of her exes who she talks about constantly.I really dont like who she is now, what do i do
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female
reader, butterflyAJA +, writes (15 August 2008):
 I think its a really great idea to talk to her. However, its only been a week & there's already trouble. It sounds to me that she's insecure. Before you put everything into this relationship....You need to figure out what you're getting yourself into. Good luck.
A
female
reader, chloe71z +, writes (15 August 2008):
 So let her know whats bothering you and if she dont change then move on. She needs to know how your hurting and why even if it dont help you and her it could help her in future relationships.
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A
female
reader, °Ale°  +, writes (15 August 2008):
 Completely agree with the posters- so what's left to do? Talk to the girl!
Let her know what bothers you and where you stand. Ask yourself if you're willing to deal the with the package. If you're not, say your goodbye's and keep on moving.
Really, relationships would be a lot better if we just communicate :)
Best of luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2008): i recently just got out of a relationship where i thought i really loved the guy. everythign was perfect at the beginging but eventually everythign just started to fall apart. by no means am i saying this is going to happen to you, but if it has alreday started with not trusting eachother that is not a good sign.
please take my word for it that you must trust each other for the relationship to work out. if you dont you are going to be miserable and feel liek you are on a leash. so dont let her accuse you of cheating (and hopefully you are not liek that).
also you cannot change who she is at all. many people when they start off in relationships they see signs that they do not like and think 'oh i can change them or it will get better..' but in reality it does not get better it can only get worse.
if she is hanging out with her ex you have to trust her. if you find out that she is doing things that are desrespectful to you with him then she is not the one for you. but if it is just innocent, you have to trusstt her.
i hope this helps and just do what you think is right. good luck!
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A
male
reader, Replacement  +, writes (15 August 2008):
 Sounds like she is insecure and has trust issues. Either you try to help her overcome these problems, or you bail out, because take it from me- dating an insecure woman isn't an easy task. It is very demanding, and eventually you'll be emotionally exhausted. You've only been dating a week, and unless you nip this in the bud asap, her insecurities will likely grow and get worse and worse. As well, it sounds like she might have feelings for one of her exes, or at least an unhealthy obsession with. Can you handle her baggage? That's what you've got to ask yourself.
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