A
female
age
36-40,
*reenstar16
writes: I've been with my boyfriend for 4yrs, yet, he hasn't talked to me about marrige. He knows that I would like to get married and have kIds but I'm 28 he's 29, and I feel like I'm getting to that point where I need to move on. How should I bring up the conversation? I didn't want to make it too awkward. I need help please.
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female
reader, Greenstar16 +, writes (2 January 2014):
Greenstar16 is verified as being by the original poster of the question I finally had the talk, he said he doesn't want to lose me. I did bring up our future together and he said he didn't want anyone else.
I was nervous but worth it, I had to tell him, plus I told him I didn't want to waste his time if we both weren't in the same page.
Thank you all!
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (31 December 2013):
I suggest that sometime, after a sumptious meal, at home, that the two of you prepared, you sit down with him and say something like this:
"You know, Hunchy-Bunchy, we've been together for 4 years now... and it's been dandy. AND (don't say "but"!!!!), I'd like to talk about our future together. Specifically, I view us getting married and starting a family. I think that that's in concert with your thoughts on the subject... but I think we've just been so busy living our lives, that we haven't spent much time thinking about that. SO.... what do you think about that?"
I'm suggesting that you need to open up such a discussion delicately, in a relaxed, and non-tension way... and let the conversation flow.... You may learn that he has the same (or similar) thoughts as you... and this will trigger the stepping off point from which you, two, will proceed.
IF you learn that he has not only not thought about marriage/family... but also doesn't intend to... then this should bring that out.. and you and he may well agree to an amicable parting of the ways...
It's worth a try...
Good luck.
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A
male
reader, M Proops +, writes (31 December 2013):
I was with my girlfriend 3 years and she was the one who said "are we getting engaged?" then "are we getting married then?" 12 months later.I said yes both times.Some men are like me,you'll just have to ask him straight out.It'll be a yes or no and you'll know exactly where you stand with him.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (31 December 2013):
Move on? Have you actually sat down with him and asked him to marry you? Or at least set a timetable, or asked him about when he wants to get married? Just because he hasn't talked about it doesn't mean he doesn't want it, but you both need to really communicate about it, and it sounds like you're sitting there waiting, and maybe he doesn't know what it really means to you.
Talk to him.
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